IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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It is well known that "
Science
Use synonyms
 is a collection of facts". Some
people
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 believe that the most important aim of
science
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 should be to improve
people
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's
lives
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.
This
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 opinion is
one
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 of the most important aims, but
science
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 doesn't necessarily have to be all about improving
lives
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 directly. The writer will explain the reasons below. On the
one
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 hand, it is so true that applied
science
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 has brought many advantages in improving human
lives
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.
For example
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, scientists
using
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 tools and
knowledge
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 to produce many vaccines and pharmaceutical products that saved millions of
lives
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.
In addition
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 to
this
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, many electronic devices like smartphones, computers and tablets are all products of applied
science
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. These aforementioned ones have made humans have longer life expectancy and
people
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's
lives
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 become easier
while
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 using these products.
Thus
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,
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science
Replace the word
scientific
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knowledge
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brought
Wrong verb form
brings
show examples
 many benefits to
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
lives
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.
For
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the other hand,
science
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also
Linking Words
 has
other
Correct quantifier usage
another
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 crucial
goals
Fix the agreement mistake
goal
show examples
and
Correct word choice
which
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 is to satisfy
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
 curiosity.
Therefore
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, basic
science
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 is motivated by natural curiosity.
This
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 vital branch of
science
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 is aimed at discovering
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
how things work, especially to find something
that is
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 hidden.
For example
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,
archeology
Change the spelling
archaeology
show examples
 is
one
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 of
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science
Add an article
the science
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 branches that probe the facts about the past.
Archeologists
Change the spelling
Archaeologists
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 took many samples to study and revealed
ages
Correct article usage
the ages
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 of the Earth, human history, etc.
This
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 helps
people
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 obtain basic
science
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knowledge
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, and
then
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 they can apply their
knowledge
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into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their
lives
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. Without basic
science
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, applied
science
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 would not exist. To summarize,
it is clear that
Linking Words
science
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 is divided into basic and applied ones. Applied
science
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used
Wrong verb form
uses
show examples
 the data and
knowledge
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 of basic
science
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 to develop and solve real-world problems. So,
one
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 of the important aims of
science
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has improved
Wrong verb form
is to improve
show examples
people
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's
lives
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, and discovering
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unknown facts to expand human
knowledge
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 is
also
Linking Words
one
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 of the main purposes
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
science
Use synonyms
. Basic
science
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 provides the foundation
knowledge
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 for applied
science
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;
therefore
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,
people
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 should not just focus on only applied
science
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 and the sake of
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 and forget about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
basic
science
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
Ensure that all parts of the essay prompt are addressed equally. Provide a more balanced discussion on whether science should exclusively focus on improving human lives or whether other purposes are equally important.
coherence cohesion
Structure your paragraphs to clearly show how your points relate to the question and to each other. This will help maintain a logical flow throughout your essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay by establishing and summarizing your viewpoint on the topic.
supported main points
You have managed to provide several examples to illustrate your points, especially about the role of science in improving lives and satisfying curiosity.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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