IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

To meet the growing need for food to support an increasing population, a country should make use of edible insects as a food source. However, some people believe that insects are not only unhealthy but harvesting them will also negatively affect nature. What are the benefits and drawbacks of eating insects? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 world of rapidly growing of
papuplation
Correct your spelling
population
 the demand
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
food
Use synonyms
 is increasing with having
a low resources
Correct the article-noun agreement
low resources
a low resource
show examples
 of
food
Use synonyms
 ,
due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 trend some
people
Use synonyms
 believe in order to
fullfill
Correct your spelling
fulfil
 the requirement
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
food
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 should start eating edible
insects
Use synonyms
 as if
this
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 happens there will be no shortage of
food
Use synonyms
.
However
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 ,others think eating
such
Linking Words
insects
Use synonyms
 can not only harm
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
huumans
Correct your spelling
humans
 but
also
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 there will be adverse
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
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 on the environmental chain.
Due to
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 the uncontrol
papuplation
Correct your spelling
population
populations
increased
Replace the word
increase
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, no doubt, there is
shortage
Add an article
a shortage
the shortage
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 of natural
food
Use synonyms
 resources and in order to maintain
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 balance
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
diet
people
Use synonyms
 are moving towards
insects
Use synonyms
 as a source of
food
Use synonyms
 which would lead to
atleast
Correct your spelling
at least
they have something to eat .
In other words
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 it may not good idea as it
effects
Replace the word
affects
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environment
Add an article
the environment
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, mankind
atleast
Correct your spelling
at least
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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something that
prevent
Change the verb form
prevents
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 them
being
Change preposition
from being
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 hungry ,even though some
insects
Use synonyms
 have more nutrients as realtives
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
other sources of
food
Use synonyms
 .
For instance
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, there is an article which
had been
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 published in 2015 which states that considering the
papulation
Correct your spelling
population
show examples
 growth mankind will be out of stock of natural
food
Use synonyms
 within decades,
Correct word choice
and
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in order to tackle
this
Linking Words
 they have to start looking for other
Use synonyms
food''s
Correct your spelling
foods
food's
ulternatives
Correct your spelling
alternatives
alternative
. No doubt
this
Linking Words
 trend might prevent humans
to
Change preposition
from
show examples
 being
hungerier
Correct your spelling
hungrier
,
it
Correct word choice
but it
show examples
 has several adverse
effect
Change to a plural noun
effects
show examples
 on society and nature. To start , there are miilion of
breed
Fix the agreement mistake
breeds
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 of
insects
Use synonyms
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them we can eat few as some of them are
natural
Change the adjective
naturally
show examples
 toxic, so finding the right one to eat
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
 which would eventually
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
these
Change the determiner
this food
show examples
food
Use synonyms
 exorbitant, it is
also
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 not budget friendly for ordinary
people
Use synonyms
.
In addition
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,
insects
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 are
integral
Add an article
an integral
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 part of
Use synonyms
food
Correct article usage
the food
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 chain especially
to
Change preposition
apply
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farming ,
eaten
Wrong verb form
Eating
show examples
 them can result in not only
Correct article usage
the
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break of
chain
Add an article
the chain
show examples
Correct word choice
but
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also
Linking Words
 makes low production of other
food
Use synonyms
 resources
such
Linking Words
 as wheat ,grains and vegetables.
To sum up
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, eating
insects
Use synonyms
 may not only lead to less affordable
food
Use synonyms
 but can be dangerous as well. Even though for a short period of time there would not
any
Add a missing verb
be any
show examples
 consequences
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the adverse effect of
this
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to
Change preposition
on
show examples
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
 would be incurable.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Try to structure your ideas into distinct paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on a single point or argument and clearly relate to the main question.
Task Achievement
Clarify and develop your main ideas more thoroughly. Ensure each point is clearly expressed and supported with examples or further explanation.
General Writing Skill
Work on sentence structure and grammar for clearer expression of ideas.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your main points instead of relying on general statements.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help to frame the discussion.
Task Achievement
You've attempted to cover both the benefits and drawbacks of eating insects, which shows a balanced approach to the question.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • food scarcity
  • edible insects
  • nutritional benefits
  • cultural barriers
  • psychological barriers
  • mainstream food source
  • carbon footprint
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • environmentally sustainable
  • economic benefits
  • local farmers
  • health safety
  • allergies
  • pesticides
  • pollutants
  • ecosystems
  • biodiversity
  • regulations
  • hygiene
  • unforeseen consequences
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