IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart gives information on the percentage of women going into higher education in five countries for the years 1980 and 2015. The chart gives information on the percentage of women going into higher education in five countries for the years 1980 and 2015.

The chart gives information on the percentage of women going into higher education in five countries for the years 1980 and 2015. The chart gives information on the percentage of women going into higher education in five countries for the years 1980 and 2015.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The
given
Verb problem
apply
show examples
bar chart
illustrated
Wrong verb form
illustrates
show examples
 different levels of post-school qualifications in Australia and the proportion of men and women who held them in 1999.
Overall
Linking Words
,
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
 of
meals
Correct your spelling
males
show examples
 achieving skilled vocational
Use synonyms
diploma
Fix the agreement mistake
diplomas
show examples
, postgraduate
Use synonyms
diploma
Fix the agreement mistake
diplomas
show examples
, and master's
Use synonyms
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
 are higher than
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
, except for undergraduate
Use synonyms
diploma
Fix the agreement mistake
diplomas
show examples
 and bachelor's
Use synonyms
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
. The rate of males with skilled vocational
Use synonyms
diploma
Fix the agreement mistake
diplomas
show examples
 has a huge significant difference from women by around 80% in 1999,
this
Linking Words
 90% rate of achievement.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there is a steep contrast
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
 postgraduate
Use synonyms
diploma
Fix the agreement mistake
diplomas
show examples
 and master's
Use synonyms
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
 with roughly 20% to 40% differences.
However
Linking Words
, there is a big gap between the two sexes when it comes to undergraduate
Use synonyms
diploma
Fix the agreement mistake
diplomas
show examples
, by 30%,
bachelor's
Correct word choice
and bachelor's
show examples
Use synonyms
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
, by 10%, of women's achievement.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words diploma, degree with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: