Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The majority of university students

eager

Add a missing verb

are eager

show examples

to enhance their knowledge

for

Change preposition

show examples

entirely touch their speciality

with

Change preposition

show examples

adding extra fields,

whereas

Linking Words

the others claim that it is more significant to devote their time to only

one

Use synonyms

specific subject for a qualification.

This

Linking Words

essay will

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

firstly

Linking Words

disscussed

Correct your spelling

discussed

about the importance level of additional lessons,

then

Linking Words

why students should pay all of their attention to

one

Use synonyms

subject,

Linking Words

finally

Correct word choice

and finally

show examples

finished

Wrong verb form

finish

show examples

with my own opinion. On the

one

Use synonyms

hand,

studing

Correct your spelling

studying

with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

additional subjects can bring some benefits, which can cover all the gaps for the people.

That is

Linking Words

to say, individuals who are doing

one

Use synonyms

specific faculty should

also

Linking Words

interract

Correct your spelling

interact

with the other lessons.

For instance

Linking Words

, in 2008,

Change the article

show examples

interview with businessmen conducted by Tom Michealson

has shown

Wrong verb form

showed

show examples

that

one

Use synonyms

of the businessmen

called

Verb problem

apply

show examples

Elon Musk not only graduated from

enginering

Correct your spelling

engineering

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

studied

programing

Correct your spelling

programming

show examples

in order to create companies.

In these

Change preposition

These

show examples

days,

one

Use synonyms

of the companies created by him called Tesla is the top

higher

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

company in the world.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, concentrating only

Use synonyms

one

Correct your spelling

show examples

Correct article usage

a spesific

show examples

spesific

Correct your spelling

specific

field,

leading

Wrong verb form

leads

show examples

learn

Change the verb form

learning

show examples

it in a deep way.

In other words

Linking Words

, it is

gratly

Correct your spelling

greatly

essential to emphasize that doing with

one

Use synonyms

main topic may outweigh those who

doing

Change the form of the verb

show examples

other subjects as well.

For example

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

research conducted by Cambridge University has shown that 60% of

successed

Correct your spelling

successful

people who did graduate

from

Change preposition

with

show examples

Add an article

the master

show examples

master

Change noun form

master's

show examples

degree

Fix the agreement mistake

degrees

show examples

as well as

Linking Words

post graduate

Add a hyphen

post-graduate

show examples

worked as a CEO of top companies. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

there are lots of benefits of working on poly subjects, in my perspective, focusing only

Use synonyms

one

Change preposition

on one

show examples

subject can bring more opportunities than the other.

i.nureddinnFri Jan 31 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

The essay addresses both views and offers an opinion, which is essential for a complete response. However, aim to develop each argument in more depth to make your essay more comprehensive.

task achievement

Try to ensure your examples are relevant and clearly linked to the points being made. Some examples, though relevant, need more explanation to thoroughly support the argument.

coherence cohesion

The essay flows logically, but work on connecting ideas more smoothly with transitional phrases to improve coherence and cohesion.

coherence cohesion

Make sure all main points are well-supported with evidence and explanations that are fully developed.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps structure the response effectively.

task achievement

The writer attempts to balance both sides of the argument, which is important in a discuss type essay.

task achievement

Good attempt at providing clear examples to support the points, adding strength to the arguments made.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
33
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

268 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Broaden
Perspectives
Specialize
Critical thinking
Problem-solving skills
Career success
Interdisciplinary connections
Structured path
Clear goals
Creativity
Innovation
Academic credibility
Recognition
Balance
Exploring

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
In several parts of the world, there is currently a lack of students choosing to study science in universities and colleges. What is the causes? And what will be the effects on society?
These days, the important matter that some countries have is the figure of students, who opt for science subjects to study in institutes, is reducing. This essay discusses the main reasons for this fashion and the influences that have on the community.
7
band
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
It is true that the excess sugar in processed foods and beverages contributes to a range of illnesses and health issues. However, I completely disagree with the idea that raising the price of sugary products is the best way to address this problem.
6
band
Increasingly, many young people are deciding to work or study in other countries. What are the causes of this phenomenon? Do you think it is a positive or negative situation?
It has become a recent trend that people study and work in different countries. The most significant cause of this is a broader experience to improve their skills and knowledge, for which I believe is a positive phenomenon regardless of some concerns of the declining number of potential people staying in their home countries.
7
band
Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Thebest way to truly relax and reduce stress is to spend time alone. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Many individuals prefer to spend their time alone when they are under stress and pressure in order to relax. I disagree that spending time by yourself to reduce stress is an efficient way to feel better.
6.5
band
Atomic energy is becoming more and more popular energy source. However, some people argue that nuclear power puts life on the Earth to danger. What is your opinion?
One of the new and popular sources of energy is Atomic source. Atomic energy can put all the countries in danger. This essay totally agrees with this idea because nuclear power can lead to serious environmental problems and can cause the killing of the citizens.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

In several parts of the world, there is currently a lack of students choosing to study science in universities and colleges. What is the causes? And what will be the effects on society?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Increasingly, many young people are deciding to work or study in other countries. What are the causes of this phenomenon? Do you think it is a positive or negative situation?

Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Thebest way to truly relax and reduce stress is to spend time alone. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Atomic energy is becoming more and more popular energy source. However, some people argue that nuclear power puts life on the Earth to danger. What is your opinion?