Some believe that the government should support artists like musicians, painters, and poets, while others argue that this is a misuse of funds. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

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There is an ongoing debate that funding art-related works is a waste of the government's budget.

While

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I tend to oppose

this

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idea, I would have to support an adequate amount of money to be allocated as a form of diplomacy to boost a country's economic growth. It is widely acknowledged that art is a form of soft diplomacy in which the regime can introduce a country's ideology and value to the global world through the least coercive strategy.

That is

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to say, funding musicians, painters, and writers can help them produce the best quality of works that can convey a subtle message of

government's

Correct article usage

the government's

show examples

agenda and ultimately attract foreign investment.

For example

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, for the

last

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two decades, Korean dramas and singers have attracted many international fans to learn about Korean culture and visit the country.

On the other hand

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, people may

also

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think that funding

such

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works is a mismanagement because they have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

very few vacancies, and require a small number of manpower.

Therefore

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many people do not see its direct benefits to their life sustainability.

For example

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, many students across countries are interested in pursuing art-related studies,

however

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looking at how the industry needs a lot of sacrifices in terms of time, energy, and money, they prefer to study

major

Correct article usage

a major

show examples

that has a more promising income like

engineer

Add an article

an engineer

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. In conclusion, it seems to me that it would be beneficial for the

authority

Fix the agreement mistake

authorities

show examples

to allocate an adequate amount of money for artists to introduce their nation worldwide, which can attract international investment and ultimately open a lot of employment opportunities.

nbmaulaniSun Feb 02 2025

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task achievement

Consider providing a more balanced view in your discussion. You may want to elaborate on the counterargument further to strengthen your essay's credibility.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure each paragraph flows logically into the next. You can use more cohesive devices to link your points clearly.

task achievement

Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion and clearly states your position.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples, like Korean culture, which illustrate your points well.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural heritage
cultural diversity
innovation
creativity
trickle-down effect
national pride
artistic independence
government funding
taxpayer burden
compromise integrity

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Some believe that the government should support artists like musicians, painters, and poets, while others argue that this is a misuse of funds. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

With the development of social media, more and more young people are being allowed unsupervised access to the internet in order to meet and chat with friends which can lead to potentially dangerous situations. What solutions can you suggest to deal with this problem?

some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

The best vway to make roads safer is to make vehicle grivers take a driving test each year. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?