The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Assel

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The first picture illustrates a public
park
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when it opened in 1920, and the second picture portrays some extensive changes
the
Change preposition
in the
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same
park
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at present.
Overall
Linking Words
, the Grange
Park
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completely
Add a missing verb
was completely
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changed and renovated. The
park
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added expanded areas, mainly related to entertainment.
Initially
Linking Words
, a cafe has replaced the glasshouse in the northeastern corner. A children’s play area has been added near the former location of the pond for water plants. The stage for musicians has been replaced with an
amphitheater
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amphitheatre
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for concerts, offering more seating and entertainment space. The fountain in the centre of the
park
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has been transformed into a modern water feature. The rose gardens remain in their original locations, but one garden near the
center
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centre
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has been removed to accommodate the new
amphitheater
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amphitheatre
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. The entrances from Arnold Avenue and Eldon Street remain unchanged, maintaining access to the
park
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, Grange
Park
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has evolved from a simple garden-oriented space into a modern recreational area.

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introduction and conclusion
Consider providing a clearer summary of the overall changes in the introduction and perhaps a more defined conclusion that reflects on the significance of these changes.
relevant examples
Incorporate more specific examples or details to enhance the description of the changes, especially regarding the features that were moved or removed.
positive observation
The essay does a good job of clearly contrasting the park's past and present features, showcasing a solid understanding of the topic.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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