IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Robot and AI are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive or negative impact on society?

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As the 21st century continues to unfold, technological
advancments
Correct your spelling
advances
 are
tranforming
Correct your spelling
transforming
 every
aspects
Change to a singular noun
aspect
show examples
 of our lives, particularly
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
robots
Use synonyms
 and AI have become significantly popular,
due to
Linking Words
 their efficiency and affordability, I suppose
this
Linking Words
 trend will impose serious challenges on societies. Admittedly, the advent of
such
Linking Words
state of the art
Add a hyphen
state-of-the-art
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 technology
that is
Linking Words
 able to accomplish a various array of activities ranging from cooking to driving
,
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apply
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 has tempted employers to hire them
instead
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 of recruiting people. The main reason behind
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 popularity is that artificial
intelligent
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intelligence
show examples
 is extremely fast and can enhance productivity at work.
In other words
Linking Words
, employers have the opportunity to
reaching
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reach
show examples
 business targets in shorter periods. Take a printer as an example, it can publish
thousand
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thousands
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copies
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of copies
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 of a book in one day,
however
Linking Words
, re-writing a book by a person may take more
a
Change preposition
than a
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month.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, using
robots
Use synonyms
 and other sorts of AI
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 far more affordable and can reduce
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
 to a minimum. Despite several benefits of
imploying
Correct your spelling
employing
show examples
 artificial itelleginets at work, I believe
this
Linking Words
 trend will
brings
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bring
show examples
 about some critical problems for societies.
Initialy
Correct your spelling
Initially
, the rate of unemployment will sharply increase, and numerous people become jobless.
Therefore
Linking Words
, lots of families will face severe financial problems.
For example
Linking Words
, when a wool factory in Tabriz, adopted
robots
Use synonyms
 and downsized the workforce, the community experienced a difficult era as previous
labor
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labour
show examples
 could not find a decent job to cover essential
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
expenses. In summary,
while
Linking Words
 AI and
robots
Use synonyms
 have the potential to improve
efficieny
Correct your spelling
efficiency
, their widespread adoption will
poses
Change the verb form
pose
show examples
 some issues on employment and social stability.

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language
Improve the spelling errors, such as 'advancments' (should be 'advancements') and 'imploying' (should be 'employing'). Additionally, correct 'thier' to 'their' and 'itelleginets' to 'intelligence'. This will enhance the readability of your essay and demonstrate attention to detail.
content
Ensure that your ideas are fully developed. For instance, offer more depth when discussing the potential negative impacts of unemployment. This will add credibility to your opinion and strengthen your overall argument.
cohesion
Consider providing a concluding statement that clearly summarizes your stance on the positive and negative impacts, to give readers a clearer perspective on your overall viewpoint.
content
You present a clear perspective on the issue and provide reasons to support your viewpoint.
content
The use of specific examples, such as the printer and the factory in Tabriz, effectively illustrates your main points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • advancements
  • efficiency
  • productivity
  • cost savings
  • labor shortages
  • job displacement
  • unemployment
  • social unrest
  • software development
  • robotics maintenance
  • AI system management
  • hazardous environments
  • economic disparities
  • re-skill
  • monotonous
  • labor-intensive
  • intellectual pursuits
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