Nowadays, some children spend many hours every day using smartphones and other devices. The advantages of allowing children to own these devices outweigh the disadvantages? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is a contentious problem whether we should allow

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation to

use

Use synonyms

technical devices. I believe that to some extent, it is beneficial for them.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, we should pay attention

how

Change preposition

to how

show examples

long our

kinds

Correct your spelling

kids

show examples

spend online and what kind of platforms they

use

Use synonyms

. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will elaborate on the advantages that outweigh the disadvantages of

this

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problem

as well as

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mention some of the main cons.

To begin

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with, online websites are the broadest source of information rather than any other we can think of. Children can

use

Use synonyms

the internet to find things their parents do not know.

Consequently

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, they can constantly grow within the fields of their interests.

For instance

Linking Words

, by searching publications from all around the world;

consequently

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, gaining international knowledge. Certainly, it is big pros of using devices

Change preposition

show examples

a young age.

Secondly

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, it is a way to connect with people. Current times

brought

Wrong verb form

bring

show examples

parents a big luxury to contact their kids from a distance and make sure they are safe.

Moreover

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, youngsters

use

Use synonyms

social platforms to maintain friendships and get to know each other.

Consequently

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, if children's access to technology is withdrawn, it will take away their important source of communication with peers. On the other, apart from useful resources, there are a lot of addictive and harmful platforms.

This

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access means not only unlimited dopamine boost, but

also

Linking Words

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

decreases the ability to focus and complete tasks.

That is

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why, parents should control what their kids are doing on the internet and limit the time they turn on devices.

To sum up

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, Innovative items bring lots of benefits. There are some threats adults should pay attention to

while

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taking care of kids;

however

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, modern times have given the young generation

opportunity

Correct article usage

the opportunity

show examples

to develop quickly and I believe it is good for them.

Aga Tue Feb 04 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to maintain a consistent argument throughout the essay. Clearly state your position in the introduction and reinforce it in the conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that your ideas are linked logically between paragraphs. Using appropriate transition words can help in making your argument clearer.

task achievement

Include more specific examples to strengthen your argument. Rather than general statements, specific case studies or statistics can enhance your points.

content

The essay presents a balanced view on the topic, acknowledging both the advantages and disadvantages of children using devices.

support

The use of examples like communication with peers is effective in illustrating your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

300 words

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Nowadays, some children spend many hours every day using smartphones and other devices. The advantages of allowing children to own these devices outweigh the disadvantages? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people believe that social media sites, such as Facebook or Twitter, have a negative impact on young people and their ability to form personal relationships. Others believe that these sites bring people together in a beneficial way. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In spite of the advances made in argiculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Scientists and technology experts seem to be more valued by modern society than musicians and artists. To what extent do you agree

Today’s schools should teach their students how to survive financially in the world today, to what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?