Some people believe that parents should limit their children hours of watching tv and playing computer games, but encourage to read books. Do you agree or disagree

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I strongly disagree with the idea that parents should prevent their children from over-watching
TV
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and over-playing
computer
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games
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and
instead
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encourage them to read
books
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. First and foremost. Playing
computer
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games
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and watching
TV
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has a great positive influence on children's development.
for example
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, Playing different types of
games
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helps children to enhance a lot of skills. online
games
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improve socializing ability,
while
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simulyator
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simulator
simulation
and puzzle
games
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boosts
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boost
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a childs
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childs
Change to a genitive case
child's
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critical thinking and creativity. Watching
TV
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on the other , documentary films give information about how everything works or provides information about the world he lives. One of the the most popular
games
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, Minecraft have elevated logic and creativity through its survival challenges in a game.
Besides
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Nature, shows have provided lots of info about wildness through their countless series about animals. Reading
books
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can provide some of them as well,but we have to take into account that reading
books
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is very boring
while
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watching
TV
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and playing
games
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is much more interesting.
In addition
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, Learning from
TV
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shows could be more effective since seeing something with your own eyes and listening
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to explanation
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explanation
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explanations
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is way better and faster than reading and imagen. In a digital age, you have to learn new technology. that's why, using a
computer
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and
TV
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could help you to better understand technology since your childhood. when students begin to learn about computers or work on the
computer
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at their elementary school, the child who used the
computer
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before to play
games
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will not struggle with
lesson
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the lesson
a lesson
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.
Additionaly
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Additionally
,
Watching
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watching TV
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tv
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with your family can enrich the family bond between child and parents. watching entertainment programs with your family members can provide unforgettable
memory
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memories
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together.
however
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, there's a skill which is can't
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develop
develep
Wrong verb form
be developed
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without reading in conclusion, playing
games
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and watching
TV
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could provide better education as long as the child watches the right program or the right game.
However
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, reading
books
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is important too. Because of
this
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, balance is key

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coherence and cohesion
Consider providing a clearer structure to your paragraphs. Each paragraph should contain a specific main idea and be focused on supporting that idea without too many distractions.
task achievement
Make sure your examples are clearly explained and directly related to your main argument to enhance clarity and relevance.
grammar and style
Watch for grammatical errors and strive for a more formal tone, as these contribute to a more academic style in writing.
content
You present a well-argued viewpoint, demonstrating your ability to engage with the topic thoughtfully, which is commendable.
examples
The use of examples, such as Minecraft and nature shows, helps to illustrate your points effectively and adds interest to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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