IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Everybody should be allowed admission to university or college programs regardless of their level of academic ability. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

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In the contemporary era,
admission
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 means to admit
students
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in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Use synonyms
university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
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 and colleges for the purpose of higher
education
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 and various
programs
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inspite
Correct your spelling
in spite
 of
academic
Correct article usage
the academic
show examples
 ability of many
students
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. In my notion, it is a positive development. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will justify my opinion with some of the reasons. To commence with ,
the
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apply
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education
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 is a basic human right, and allowing everyone to attend
university
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 promotes equality and diversity in higher
education
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. The
education
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 criteria
includes
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include
show examples
percentage
Add an article
a percentage
the percentage
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 of
vaious
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various
 candidates and they display
merit
Correct article usage
a merit
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 list of selected
candidate
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candidates
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 on the notice board.
For example
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, if some
students
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 want to study science, history,
accountancy
Correct word choice
or accountancy
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 these all have some specific quota for
the
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apply
show examples
admission
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 as per percentage.
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University
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Universities
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 can provide
programs
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 that align with different academic abilities, enabling
students
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 of all levels to succeed and contribute
in
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to
show examples
 these
programs
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. The diverse student bodies enrich the learning environment, allowing
students
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 to share different perspectives, experiences, and
culture
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cultures
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 that benefit all. Moving ahead, the skilled individuals who may not meet traditional academic criteria, universities can offer alternative
admission
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 criteria based on interviews, portfolios and practical skills assessment.
For example
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- In many colleges, there are painting and dancing competitions events
organise
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organised
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 by the authorities which help many less academic ability
students
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will
Verb problem
apply
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get
admission
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in
Change preposition
to
show examples
university
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 by
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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 different methods.
Further
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
university
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arrange
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arranges
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 award winning functions to entertain
students
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 and attract them to their
university
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 to
getting
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
admission
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in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their colleges. In conclusion, I reiterate that the innumerable factors supplying
that
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apply
show examples
the purpose of higher
education
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 and various
programs
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inspite
Correct your spelling
in spite
 of
academic
Correct article usage
the academic
show examples
 ability of many
students
Use synonyms
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
cannot be overlooked either.

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task achievement
The introduction could be clearer in stating your position on the extent of agreement or disagreement. It's essential to present your stance straightforwardly.
coherence and cohesion
More transitions and clearer connections between ideas would improve the flow of the essay. Linking phrases can help guide the reader through your points more smoothly.
task achievement
Try to elaborate more on your examples. Some points could benefit from more detailed explanations to strengthen your argument and show how they relate to your thesis.
task achievement
The essay addresses the topic and provides arguments for the position taken. It shows an understanding of the importance of diversity in education.
coherence and cohesion
You present a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is a good foundation for your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic ability
  • higher education
  • equality
  • diversity
  • inclusivity
  • alternative admission criteria
  • skilled individuals
  • learning environment
  • perspectives
  • practical skills
  • portfolios
  • diverse student bodies
What to do next:
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