In the future, the main reason for going to the shopping mall will be for entertainment, not to shop. Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays many go to shopping
centers
not just as Change the spelling
centres
consumer
, but Add an article
a consumer
also
for fulfilling their leisure time. Linking Words
Majority
of people believe there will be a time Correct article usage
The majority
that
entertainment Correct word choice
when
become
Change the verb form
becomes
main
purpose of attending Change the article
the main
malls
. I’m going to discuss Use synonyms
this
topic and Linking Words
giving
my opinion.
Today there are many activities which can be done in shopping Wrong verb form
give
malls
to have Use synonyms
fun
Use synonyms
beside
shopping. Having Change preposition
besides
nice
meal is one of them. Food Add an article
a nice
court
Fix the agreement mistake
courts
has
become an inseparable part of modern Correct subject-verb agreement
have
malls
, and they are not just cheap and easy access Use synonyms
fast
foods Change preposition
to fast
such
as Linking Words
MacDonald
or KFC, but they are Change noun form
MacDonald's
also
fancy, luxurious restaurants that are Linking Words
in
a quality which is suitable even for dates. For me, who I’m a person with a great desire for food, Change preposition
of
this
Linking Words
food-floor
is a perfect thing that I go for it even when I don’t have anything to do in Correct your spelling
food floor
mall
.
Another thing Add an article
the mall
that is
inevitable in these contemporary sheltered so-many-storied markets, is an area for amusement Linking Words
that
people can have Correct word choice
where
fun
with their family and friends. Use synonyms
For instance
, bowling is Linking Words
on
of the most popular sports Correct your spelling
one
that
it’s Correct word choice
and
fun
to do it with Use synonyms
you
peers. Escape rooms with horror or mysterious stories satisfy your Correct pronoun usage
your
needs
for excitement. Personally, I prefer ice skating as my Fix the agreement mistake
need
favorite
activity to do in shopping Change the spelling
favourite
centers
.
I strongly believe, because of all Change the spelling
centres
these
Correct determiner usage
this
fun
and equipment in Use synonyms
malls
, day by day the number of people who are not there for shopping will Use synonyms
be boost
as Change the verb form
be boosted
malls
going to be improved. Use synonyms
To sum up
, there will be a future Linking Words
that
Change preposition
in
shopping
centers do nothing with buying and selling.Correct pronoun usage
which shopping
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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your position on the topic and provides a brief overview of the points you will discuss.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use linking words and phrases to improve the flow between ideas and paragraphs. This will enhance the coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Provide more developed examples or reasons to strengthen your main points, as some ideas are introduced but not explored in depth.
content
You have identified relevant activities in shopping malls that contribute to the entertainment aspect, which is a good approach for the topic.
content
Your personal preferences presented in the essay add a unique touch, making your argument more relatable.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite