IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people think that youngsters should be required to do unpaid work helping people in the community. Are disadvantages of this requirement greater than the benefits for the community and individuals?

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Should youngsters be required to do unpaid community
work
Use synonyms
?Community services are a good way to develop valuable life skills and contribute
society
Change preposition
to society
show examples
.In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 is a very controversial statement. On the one hand,youth gain very important skills from volunteering.By helping those in need,they develop compassion and an understanding of social issues,which makes them active and responsible in future life.
Additionally
Linking Words
,volunteering
enchance
Correct your spelling
enhance
particial
Correct your spelling
practical
 skills,
as
Correct quantifier usage
such as
show examples
 teamwork,leadership and communication,which are beneficial for both personal and professional development.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,a requirement for unpaid
work
Use synonyms
 leads to serious problems,
as
Correct quantifier usage
such as
show examples
 a lack of motivation and enthusiasm.If youngsters feel coerced rather the inspired,
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
show examples
 of their
work
Use synonyms
 may suffer,reducing its effectiveness.
Moreover
Linking Words
, some young people already suffering
to
Change preposition
from
show examples
 part-time
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 and extracurricular activities.Adding volunteering could increase stress and reduce the time
availiable
Correct your spelling
available
 for studies.
While
Linking Words
 unpaid community
work
Use synonyms
 offers significant benefits to both individuals and society, making it a mandatory requirement may cause unintended negative consequences. Encouraging, rather than forcing, young people to participate in volunteer activities may be a more effective approach. Schools and universities should promote volunteering as
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 opportunity rather than
obligation
Correct article usage
an obligation
show examples
 Ensuring that young people have valuable and enjoyable experiences rather than seeing it as a duty.

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more specific examples and explanations to support your points. For instance, you could provide specific instances of skills gained through volunteering.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure clear and logical connections between ideas to enhance coherence. Consider using linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Work on grammatical accuracy, paying attention to punctuation and word choice. For example, 'participial skills' should be 'practical skills.'
task achievement
You effectively address the topic and present both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced view.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes your argument well, making it clear that you believe encouragement is more beneficial than obligation.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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