These days, many people have their own computer and telephone, so it is quite easy for them to do their job at home.Does working at home have more advantages or more disadvantages?

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Nowadays, the issue of working
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home
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from home
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becomes
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is becoming
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more and more globalized. İn
this
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regard, some people believe that remote
work
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is very significant,
although
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others claim that
this
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option is irrelevant. Below, I will touch on both
benefits
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the benefits
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and drawbacks of
this
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situation. As far as I am concerned, there are a number of positive aspects
on
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of
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telecommuting. First and foremost, you start
work
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when you need to and finish when you want. Especially,
this
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option is convenient
parents
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for parents
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of little children. For
intance
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instance
, they can easily take to them
from
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apply
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school. They can
also
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make
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do
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any other tasks
such
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as cleanliness or shopping. One of the most important advantages is the flexibility
,
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apply
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because
with
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, with
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no morning commute, the distance between
home
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and the office is no longer an obstacle.
Besides
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, cost saving is very important. To illustrate, not driving to
work
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saves money: financially, ecologically and others. ​
However
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, some people don't share my point of view.
According to
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them, working
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home
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from home
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has many downsides. One of the biggest complaints about remote
work
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is the sense of isolation.
This
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means that they don't have extended networks and
such
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people become asocial.
On the other hand
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,
this
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option leads to
lack
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a lack
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of motivation and collaboration. Lack of motivation can adversely employees affect their
productive
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productivity
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. In conclusion,
although
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there are positives and negatives working from
home
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, there are more
postitive
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positive
impacts.
Therefore
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, most companies should consider establishing online business rules in the modern world.

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coherence and cohesion
Consider revising the introduction for clarity. Make sure the statement about different viewpoints is clearly articulated.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance the conclusion by restating your main points and reinforcing your stance.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. For instance, cite how remote work might affect work-life balance.
coherence and cohesion
Consider using a wider range of vocabulary and varied sentence structures to improve fluency.
task achievement
Good attempt to address both sides of the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is well-organized with distinct paragraphs for different points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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