Children are facing more pressures from academic, social and commercial sources. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce it?

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this

Linking Words

contemporary world,

children

Use synonyms

undergo a lot of pressure from family,

teachers

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and social

media

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platforms. The major

cause

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for

this

Linking Words

problem is comparing a

child

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with other

children

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Additionally

Linking Words

, they face

fear

Add an article

the fear

show examples

of failure and

urge

Correct article usage

the urge

show examples

to achieve at

early

Add an article

an early

show examples

age. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss

different

Correct article usage

the different

show examples

pressures

children

Use synonyms

are facing and possible solutions for that. The significant problem with today's society is comparing

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

children

Use synonyms

with other

junvenile's

Correct your spelling

juveniles

juvenile's

achievements.

Moreover

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, doing

this

Linking Words

can

cause

Use synonyms

social isolation and frustration in young minds. Every

child

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is different and they have unique abilities. So,

parents

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and

teachers

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should identify their

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

and

passion

Fix the agreement mistake

passions

show examples

and work towards enhancing them. By doing

this

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

could actively participate in their passionate studies or activities and excel in them. A recent study from Annamalai University found that most students pursue their careers

Change preposition

through

show examples

compulsion

Correct article usage

the compulsion

show examples

of their

parents

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or relatives.

Finally

Linking Words

, these students become unskilled professionals

due to

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lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of passion in their work.

In addition

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to that, most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

children

Use synonyms

want to succeed earlier in life because of pressure from social

media

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success

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stories.

Firstly

Linking Words

parents

Use synonyms

and

teachers

Use synonyms

should find the

child

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's interest and

nuture

Correct your spelling

nurture

them to achieve their goal.

For example

Linking Words

, if a

child

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is good at drawing,

parents

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should encourage and help them to master

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that skill rather than instilling their dreams.

Secondly

Linking Words

success

Use synonyms

and

failures

Fix the agreement mistake

failure

show examples

are part of life and should be treated equally.

Moreover

Linking Words

parents

Use synonyms

compare the other

Use synonyms

children

Change noun form

children's

show examples

success

Use synonyms

to their own.

This

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can

cause

Use synonyms

inferiority

Correct article usage

an inferiority

show examples

complex in

children

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and lead to depression. So, they should avoid and spend time with

children

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Finally

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, parental controls should be enabled

Change preposition

show examples

gadgets like mobiles and laptops.

Moreover

Linking Words

, monitoring social

media

Use synonyms

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

and

watch

Wrong verb form

watching

show examples

history helps to find the

children

Use synonyms

interest

Fix the agreement mistake

interests

show examples

. In conclusion, today's

children

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are facing pressures from family and society

due to

Linking Words

comparison with other kids and fear of failure in life. To tackle

this

Linking Words

parents

Use synonyms

and

teachers

Use synonyms

should find a

childs

Change noun form

child's

show examples

interest and help them to pursue

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their career.

In addition

Linking Words

to that, social

media

Use synonyms

success

Use synonyms

stories should be avoided and it can

cause

Use synonyms

urge

Add an article

the urge

an urge

show examples

to early

success

Use synonyms

ksanthosh701Thu Feb 13 2025

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task achievement

Further develop ideas with more examples and explanations to create a more comprehensive argument.

coherence cohesion

Ensure proper spelling and phrasing, particularly with words like 'juvenile's' which should be 'juveniles' and 'nuture' which should be 'nurture'.

coherence cohesion

Provide a clearer distinction between the different pressures discussed to enhance clarity and logical flow.

task achievement

The essay effectively identifies key pressures faced by children in contemporary society.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion summaries the key points effectively, highlighting the main arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

353 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

academic pressure
peer pressure
consumer culture
high expectations
mental health support
mindfulness programs
stress-relief
extracurricular activities
unrealistic standards
social media influence
advertising targeting
mental health education

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Children are facing more pressures from academic, social and commercial sources. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce it?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The importance of biodiversity is being more widely recognised as increasing numbers of species come under threat. what can be done to maintain biodiversity?

We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a friend who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter: Give details of your study plans Explain why you want to get a part-time job

In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative

n some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. Do you agree or disagree?