Today our communications, medicine and transport systems all depend on computer technology. Our reliance on computer technology in these fields has created a dangerous situation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

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Technology
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plays a main role in communication
systems
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like medical and transport
systems
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. From my point of view, Relying on computers for transport and other
systems
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does not create any dangerous situations
whereas
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, some people
are believing
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believe
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that electronic
systems
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disturbs
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disturb
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the human lifestyle. Transportation became the main source for everyone, starting from
traveling
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travelling
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to couriering things from one place to another.
For example
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, if we send the documents from our native place to some office which is located at a different place, we have to track the courier to know the location of the documents, and we can estimate the date at what time it will reach the goal location. It is possible through the
computer
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and
technology
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. Without
technology
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, we don't even know where the documents are placed during
traveling
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travelling
show examples
.
Similarly
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, the
computer
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is used in the medical field to print bills and all the information about the patient in the form of paper. The details of patients and doctors who treated them all are saved on the
computer
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. If we go to the hospital, they will give us a printed paper with the hospital name and all where there is no chance to cheat the patient with fake reports and prices of the medicines. People can use these papers in the future to show as a shred of evidence for any problem. I strongly believe that
computer
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technology
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does not affect people which leads to dangerous situations. In today's world computers are more trustable than humans. I totally disagree
the
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with the
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point that
technology
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creates
a
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apply
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hazourdous
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hazardous
situations
to
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for
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citizens.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure your introduction presents a clear thesis statement that directly addresses the topic and your position. Additionally, provide a conclusion that summarizes your main points succinctly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Revise sentence structures for improved clarity and flow, as some sentences are slightly awkward or unclear. Try to vary your vocabulary and sentence length for better engagement.
Task Achievement
Include more detailed examples and explanations to support your claims in both transport and medical technology. This will strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.
Task Achievement
Clarify your position more definitively in your concluding statements, perhaps by briefly reiterating the main reasons you disagree with the dangers of technology.
Task Achievement
You have taken a clear stance on the issue, expressing your opinion that reliance on technology is not dangerous.
Task Achievement
Your examples related to transport and medical systems are relevant, showing your understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • reliance
  • cybersecurity
  • over-reliance
  • digital divide
  • data breach
  • cyberbullying
  • diagnostic machines
  • electronic health records
  • automated vehicles
  • predictive maintenance
  • real-time monitoring
  • vulnerability
  • misinformation
  • hacking
  • efficiency
  • navigation systems
  • traditional skills
  • system failures
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