IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

People nowadays prefer to interact online (e.g. do shopping, chat with friends) rather than talking to other people face-to-face. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

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In recent years,
while
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 some people opt to do their daily activities face-to-face, others choose to do them on the internet. My take on
this
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, growth the growth of the population and in the meantime, the improvement of technology have become trendy all over the world. I suppose
,
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apply
show examples
 it gives off
such
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 a positive vibe when I send messages to my friends.
However
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, it has
also
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 certain drawbacks
such
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 as the overuse of internet in the society, which makes people more unconscious about life.

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Task Achievement
Work on enhancing the clarity of your ideas and arguments. Try to expand your points with more detail and examples to make them more compelling.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the logical flow and structure of your essay. Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next and clearly supports your main argument.
Task Achievement
Your introduction raises a relevant issue and indicates your perspective on the topic.
Task Achievement
You touched on both positive and negative aspects of online interaction, showing a balanced view.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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