IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Nowadays, health systems became so costy and exceeded some families with limited financial ability

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Any devoted mother bestows her children
an immense sacrifices
Correct the article-noun agreement
immense sacrifices
an immense sacrifice
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, and even more for
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
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 battling illness. Nowadays we are living in
truly
Correct article usage
a truly
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 materialistic world followed by treatment costs are prohibitively expensive and
myriad
Correct article usage
a myriad
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parents
Change preposition
of parents
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observed
Wrong verb form
observing
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thier
Correct your spelling
their
 infants
while
Linking Words
 they are dying have
no thing
Correct your spelling
nothing
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 to do except restoring to garnering donations from medical senior executives. I am from the most fervently_pro that doctors and all medical field staff have no total responsibility for those patients simply owing
to
Change preposition
apply
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they do not work
in
Change preposition
with
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 the aim of altruism, thereby governments should convey the sense of urgency via
organisation
Add an article
the organisation
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 of charity dedicated to impoverished and
low_income
Correct your spelling
low-income
 families.

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structural
The introduction should clearly outline the main points of your argument to guide the reader. Consider including a thesis statement that reflects the main issues you'll discuss.
structural
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and includes supporting details. This will help enhance clarity and logical flow in your argument.
content
While you have some valid points, including more specific examples would strengthen your argument and provide clearer insights into the issue.
content
You present a passionate argument regarding the challenges faced by families in accessing healthcare, showcasing strong emotion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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