IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The internet has become profoundly efficient and popular that people choose it as a platform to learn. Some believe that it would eventually replace the need for books. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many people opine that the
internet
Use synonyms
 has become so efficient and accessible that it will eventually replace the need for
books
Use synonyms
. I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 viewpoint because the
internet
Use synonyms
 provides vast information instantly and is more convenient for learning. On one hand, the
internet
Use synonyms
 provides unlimited access to knowledge from anywhere in the world. Unlike,
books
Use synonyms
 which are limited in number and
requires
Change the verb form
require
show examples
 to be stored physically, digital sources are available anytime at any moment where
theres
Correct your spelling
there
there's
internet
Use synonyms
 connection.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Online articles, e-
books
Use synonyms
,
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
, and websites offer updated perspectives on any subject making them superior to physically printed
books
Use synonyms
. And
in addition
Linking Words
 to that, digital learning platforms offer fun and engaging methods of educating that
books
Use synonyms
 cannot. Online courses, informational videos, and games enhance
understanding
Correct article usage
the understanding
show examples
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 students with different learning styles and techniques.
Example
Change preposition
For example
show examples
; visual learners benefit from animations and infographics,
while
Linking Words
 auditory learners can listen to podcasts or
audio
Correct your spelling
audiobooks
show examples
books
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
,
This
Linking Words
vareity
Correct your spelling
variety
 makes
internet
Use synonyms
 sources more effective. Discussing
further
Linking Words
, the
internet
Use synonyms
 is more cost-efficient and environmentally friendlier than traditional
books
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Digital sources reduce the need for paper production, helping in the preservation of forest lands.
In contrast
Linking Words
, many online materials are free or cheaper than printed
books
Use synonyms
, making education more accessible to people worldwide. In conclusion, considering its wide range
accessibility
Change preposition
of accessibility
show examples
, interactive nature, and cost benefits, the
Use synonyms
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 is likely to replace traditional
books
Use synonyms
 in the future.
While
Linking Words
books
Use synonyms
 have been crucial in education, digital learning offers a more efficient alternative. Embracing technology in education ensures that knowledge remains easily available and engaging for future generations.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence
Clarify the comparison between the internet and books in your main points. Ensure that each paragraph explicitly relates back to how the internet might replace books.
task achievement
Include more specific examples or data to support your points about accessibility, engagement, and cost-effectiveness of online learning versus traditional books.
task achievement
Your essay effectively presents a clear opinion that is consistently supported throughout your response.
coherence
You maintain a logical flow of ideas, which enhances the overall readability of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • profoundly
  • efficient
  • platform
  • replace
  • online courses
  • resources
  • current
  • dynamic
  • engaging
  • diverse
  • accessible
  • multimedia
  • information retention
  • convenience
  • flexible
  • personalized
  • permanence
  • distractions
  • connection
  • digital reading fatigue
  • screen time
What to do next:
Look at other essays: