Many people believe that music is just a form of entertainment, while others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

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Introduction

We live in

this

Linking Words

world

that

Correct word choice

where

show examples

music

Use synonyms

is one of

important

Add an article

the important

show examples

things in our lives.

Therefore

Linking Words

,it has a huge impact

Change preposition

show examples

every one of us. In

this

Linking Words

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I will explain my point of view and my suggestion to it.

Body paragraph 1

Most of us think that

music

Use synonyms

is just

Remove the article

apply

show examples

entertainment, and it's everywhere. Having a band group or just

simple

Change the word

simply

show examples

attend

Wrong verb form

attending

show examples

concert

Correct article usage

a concert

show examples

after

the

Correct article usage

show examples

long day

hard

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of hard

show examples

work, makes us feel better and

relax

Wrong verb form

relaxed

show examples

Moreover

Linking Words

, we take it for granted, and we never truly understand the meaning of it.

For instance

Linking Words

, people

thinks

Change the verb form

think

show examples

that if you join some

music

Use synonyms

group, it's just a hobby and a

past time

Correct your spelling

pastime

show examples

. Learning

new

Add an article

a new

show examples

musical instrument or listening to

music

Use synonyms

from

Change preposition

show examples

the radio it's just

normal

Correct article usage

a normal

show examples

thing and we can't earn a lot through

music

Use synonyms

Body paragraph 2

On the other hand

Linking Words

, to other

people

Add a comma

people,

show examples

music

Use synonyms

is their life the way they see it is part of them. It can

gives

Change the verb form

give

show examples

a lot of good health benefits to

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

For example

Linking Words

according to

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

reasearch

Correct your spelling

research

listening to one song in a day

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

can reduce the stress and anxiety of

the

Correct article usage

show examples

person.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, it can release the real emotion of an individual through melody, if they feel sad or happy they can relate to the song.

Also

Linking Words

, there

Add a missing verb

are a

show examples

lot of people who are

talentend

Correct your spelling

talented

when it comes to

music

Use synonyms

, a great singer,

composer

Fix the agreement mistake

composers

show examples

, and

muscians

Correct your spelling

musicians

were

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

talented in

this

Linking Words

genre.

Conclusion

In conclusion, I believe

music

Use synonyms

is important we live every day through sound and

music

Use synonyms

. Sometimes even the

song

Fix the agreement mistake

songs

show examples

with different language we can still feel the emotion without knowing the words.

Besides

Linking Words

, without it earth will be dull and not happy to live in.

chesleykerserarellano

Feb 17, 2025

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task response

The introduction could better outline the arguments that will be discussed in the essay. It should clearly indicate that both views will be examined.

coherence cohesion

Some paragraphs could benefit from clearer topic sentences to summarize the main idea and improve overall structure. This will help guide the reader through your points.

coherence cohesion

Make sure to proofread for grammatical issues (e.g., 'a reasearch' should be 'research', 'gives' should be 'give'). This will enhance clarity and professionalism.

task response

Try to provide more specific examples to back up your points. For instance, mentioning specific studies or personal experiences would increase the relevance and depth of your arguments.

task response

You provided a balanced view by discussing both perspectives on the impact of music, which shows a clear understanding of the task.

task response

The conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion and presents a strong statement about music's importance in our lives.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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Many people believe that music is just a form of entertainment, while others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Some people believe that professional workers such as doctors and teachers should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many parts of the world people do research in family history. Some people believe that research on the previous generation to be useful while others say that it is better to focus on the present and future generation. Discuss and opinion.

Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

As cyber-perpetration is becoming a main online problem, social media and technological companies should be obligated by government to launch strict policy(ies) against cyber-bullying. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Many people today are worried about the large quantities of waste produced by ordinary households. What problems are caused by household waste, and what solutions may be possible in both the short and the long term?