In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In many countries,

transportation

Use synonyms

development is always a controversial debate. Most

people

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often believe that

Correct article usage

show examples

investment

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new railways which link cities is more beneficial than enhancing

current

Correct article usage

the current

show examples

public

transportation

Use synonyms

infrastructure. Meanwhile, others advocate that the money should be redirected to public

transportation

Use synonyms

While

Linking Words

local

improvments

Correct your spelling

improvements

support the welfare and comfort of the society and it

reduce

Change the verb form

reduces

show examples

traffic jams, railway construction endorses the country's economy, since it is very crucial for trading. In my opinion, the idea of building railways has

broader

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a broader

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impact on more

people

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and it strongly contributes the finance, which outweighs public

transportation

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improvements in terms of influence. On the one hand, public

transportation

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stands out as the most significant point for city livability, because it has

direct

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a direct

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affect

Replace the word

effect

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on individuals' comfort and welfare. In

contamporary

Correct your spelling

contemporary

cities, local facilities increase connectivity of the city, so

people

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are more tend to use public vehicles rather than their private cars.

Therefore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

approach indirectly shrinks traffic

congestions

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congestion

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As a result

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

acquire

higher

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a higher

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quality of life,

while

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city

Correct article usage

the city

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mitigates street

crowdness

Correct your spelling

crowdedness

crowds

. A clear example of

this

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can be seen in Paris, the government of France strictly promotes public

transportation

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usage since 2010.

This

Linking Words

powerful policy profoundly reduced car crowdness by 46% only in a few years.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the most impressive results of

this

Linking Words

attitude published in the 2020 Happiness Report,

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

indicates

Correct subject-verb agreement

indicate

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the

Correct your spelling

that

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Parisians are 32% happier than before.

Nonetheless

Linking Words

, to understand the beneficial points of railway construction the community should look from

wider

Add an article

a wider

show examples

perspective

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

since

this

Linking Words

approach highly supports the national economy. Especially, traders and companies would benefit from

this

Linking Words

enhancement, since

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

one of the biggest

obstacle

Fix the agreement mistake

obstacles

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price

Add an article

the price

show examples

of goods

transportation

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, national

transportation

Use synonyms

developments would significantly reduce the price, if it is exerted.

For instance

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, the USA implemented their railways in 1865,

thereafter

Linking Words

, the

finance

Fix the agreement mistake

finances

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of the USA exploded and doubled

itself

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

. That demonstrates the influence of wider

transportation

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. In conclusion, even

these

Correct word choice

though these

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two arguments are

extremly

Correct your spelling

extremely

debatable, I strongly advocate for the wider remedy, which is railway construction. It provides a pragmatic solution, which helps the community to obtain all of the results of public

transportation

Use synonyms

, and as a

plus

Add a comma

plus,

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also

Linking Words

grow

Change the verb form

grows

show examples

the nation's

finance

Fix the agreement mistake

finances

show examples

loloyun7Mon Feb 17 2025

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Coherence and Cohesion

Your introduction presents the topic clearly, but consider rephrasing for improved clarity and flow. The thesis could be stated more directly.

Coherence and Cohesion

Some points in the body paragraphs could be better connected. Use transitional phrases to improve flow between ideas.

Task Achievement

While your examples are relevant, ensure they are fully explained. Some arguments could benefit from a more detailed connection to the thesis.

Task Achievement

Good use of examples to support the argument, particularly the case of public transportation in Paris.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your conclusion summarizes the key arguments effectively and reinforces your opinion nicely.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

363 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

infrastructure
efficient
congestion
sustainable
environmentally friendly
connectivity
economic growth
public transportation

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