IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that parents should teach children hoe to become good member og society other however, believe that school,is the best learning place Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

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There is no denying the fact that
parents
Use synonyms
 must teach children how to use
Add an article
a hoe
the hoe
show examples
hoe
Correct your spelling
how
show examples
 to become good
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members
show examples
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
Correct article usage
the communtiy
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communtiy
Correct your spelling
community
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, others believe that the school
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 right
place
Use synonyms
 to
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both views and give my opinion with
exaples
Correct your spelling
examples
. On the
on
Correct your spelling
one
show examples
 hand, the father should take his child outside to teach him new things he
does
Wrong verb form
did
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 not know about it
befoer
Correct your spelling
before
 because
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life now has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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changed all the
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
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, people,
government
Correct word choice
and government
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, needs
skills
Use synonyms
 who want to
success
Replace the word
succeed
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life.
In addition
Linking Words
, when someone wants to get
skills
Use synonyms
 should learn the
skills
Use synonyms
 in his childhood with his
parents
Use synonyms
 that means people who
Correct subject-verb agreement
want
show examples
wants
Add the particle
wants to
show examples
 learn new
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
 there are
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
good places to
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
.
For example
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, when you need to learn about the car you must go to the
place
Use synonyms
Correct pronoun usage
that teach
show examples
teach
Correct subject-verb agreement
teaches
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 you about the car.
On the other hand
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, the
parents
Use synonyms
 will help when you need anything but when you want to learn something there
is
Change the verb form
are
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 many places to teach you.
Although
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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 many people think they can learn
individual
Change the word
individually
show examples
 it is possible to learn alone but not
Change preposition
in the
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 good way
due to
Linking Words
 you will make
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of mistakes that the
negitive
Correct your spelling
negative
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
 about it.
For instance
Linking Words
, when you need to learn anything you should go to the right
place
Use synonyms
 that will teach you the
skills
Use synonyms
 and the experience about it.
To sum up
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, in my
opinion
Add the comma(s)
opinion,
show examples
 there are many
way
Change to a plural noun
ways
show examples
 to
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
 things but should learn in
the
Change the article
a
show examples
 good
place
Use synonyms
 like the school or university,
work
Correct word choice
and work
show examples
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 correct
place
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I believe that many
parents
Use synonyms
takes
Change the verb form
take
show examples
 care
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 children but the big issue when
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 want to teach
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 children
they
Add a missing verb
is they
show examples
 make
mistake
Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
show examples
 because they do not
grap
Correct your spelling
get
 them
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the correct
place
Use synonyms
.

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coherence and cohesion
Improve sentence structure and grammar for clarity.
task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports the main argument.
coherence and cohesion
You have included an introduction and conclusion, which is a good structure.
task achievement
You provided examples to support your points, which is beneficial for clarity.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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