# **Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.** Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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These days, some university
students
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have
idea
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an idea
the idea
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that
besides
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the main subject, they should
study
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some extra
courses
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.
However
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, others debate that they should invest all their
time
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and efforts to focus on the main course. From my perspective, we should let
students
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to
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apply
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study
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extra
courses
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, but we should recommend
them
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they
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well
distributing
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distribute
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time
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and effort to
study
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those additional subjects
along with
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the main subjects. It is undeniable that university
time
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is essential for
students
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because it prepares them
the
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for the
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important knowledge for their
majors
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before they join the workforce. With
deep
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a deep
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understanding
about
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of
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the major,
students
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have more opportunities and higher competency than other applicants who change their
majors
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when applying for a
job
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relating to their
majors
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even though they have not yet had any working experience.
Furthermore
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, they will not be overwhelmed by the knowledge they will apply in the jobs, but they will have more
time
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to adapt themselves
in
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to
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the office environment and develop their soft skills. Taking a student majoring in Software Engineer as an example, when he
get
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gets
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a
job
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as a Software Engineer, it is easier for him to read, understand, and code a
programme
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program
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compared to
students
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in
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of
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the same age who graduated with
a
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an
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Electrical Engineering degree
although
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he has trained himself some codings.
However
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, the
job
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market is currently experiencing
the
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apply
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significant shifts in employees between
majors
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and changes in skills within each major
due to
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technology
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technological
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advancement.
Therefore
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, extra
courses
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help prepare
students
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cross-field
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for cross-field
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knowledge at
their
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an
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early age so that they can flexibly adapt to the changes in the workforce
as well as
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help
students
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to
Verb problem
apply
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understand their favours so that they can make suitable decisions for their career paths.
As a result
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, universities should design and limit the course selections to the most related
courses
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to each major in which
students
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can
study
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because it can negatively affect
students
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by overwhelming
students
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in choosing which additional subjects they should
study
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or some
students
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might follow their friends which can confusing
students
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in making decisions for their careers. In summary,
while
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investing
time
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and
efforts
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effort
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for
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in
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a major will well prepare
students
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for the
job
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market, we should not ignore the benefits of extra
courses
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. I believe that balancing
time
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to
study
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main and extra
courses
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is the most suitable method to educate
students
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.

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introduction
Your introduction presents both views well but could benefit from clearer language and structure. Ensure that your opinion is explicitly stated and linked to both views.
coherence
Try to improve transition phrases between paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay. This will help readers follow your points more easily.
task achievement
When providing examples, make sure they are specifically relevant to the argument you are making, as this strengthens your points and supports your opinion effectively.
task achievement
You provided a balanced discussion by acknowledging both perspectives on the issue, showing an understanding of the topic and relevance to students' needs in education.
content
The examples of software engineering and the current job market provide context for your arguments, making them more relatable and informative.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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