You are a high school teacher. A student of yours has just graduated with excellent marks from high school. This person wants to find work. Write an email to this student in about 150-200 words. Explain how you feel about her high school grades, why a college education is good and why going to work instead of college is unwise.

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Dear Helen, I am writing
this
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email to express my feelings regarding your excellent performance in high school and give you some advice for your
further
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plans. As a teacher at Marporle
high school
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High School
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, my emotions are over the moon seeing your amazing grades
at the end
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of the year. Being part of your journey makes me feel excited since I am mindful of your hard work. Hiring tutors, taking extra classes, and spending your weekend time studying hard are just some examples of your study commitment.
Moreover
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, I would like to advise you about your next step. I consider attending the college would be a wise decision.
Firstly
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, studying
a
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for a
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bachelor's degree will bring several benefits to your future
such
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as a higher educational level, professional knowledge, and networking.
Nonetheless
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, if you start working
instead
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of studying you might lose many of those opportunities.
Also
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, since you have fantastic grades, you would be able to ask for a scholarship.
Lastly
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, having a bachelor will foster your professional profile;
thus
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, you may be more attractive in the
labor
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labour
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market. I hope these pieces of advice suit you, I wish you all the best in your future. Regards, Professor Lan

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coherence and cohesion
Consider improving the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs for better coherence. For instance, introduce the importance of college education sooner in your response instead of having a long emotional introduction.
task achievement
Make sure to include a more detailed conclusion that succinctly summarizes your main points to reinforce your message.
content
Your emotional connection to the student and acknowledgment of their hard work is commendable and adds a personal touch to the message.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • pride
  • excellent marks
  • college education
  • opportunities
  • career prospects
  • earning potential
  • competitive nature
  • job market
  • advantage
  • personal development
  • networking
  • real-world experience
  • unwise
  • graduate
  • commitment
  • investment
  • skills
  • knowledge
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