These days, many people like to watch live performances (such as shows or concerts) at home, either on TV or on a computer, instead of attending in person. Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

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Nowadays,some part of

public

Add an article

the public

show examples

,watch their

favorite

Change the spelling

favourite

show examples

program or shows on

Use synonyms

or on a computer rather than attend

Change preposition

apply

show examples

live

Replace the word

life

show examples

.There are certain drawbacks,

Linking Words

whereas

Correct word choice

but

show examples

also

Linking Words

leads to many benefits.In

this

Linking Words

essay,I will touch on both

positive

Correct article usage

the positive

show examples

and negative sides of

this

Linking Words

situation. On the one hand,when people watch live

performances

Use synonyms

at home,they don't need to

doing

Verb problem

make

show examples

any effort like

Wrong verb form

going

show examples

outside and

use

Wrong verb form

using

show examples

transports

Fix the agreement mistake

transport

show examples

to watch live

performances

Use synonyms

.It is

loss

Correct article usage

a loss

show examples

of energy

while

Linking Words

they do it,

however

Linking Words

thanks to technological sophistication,people can watch

performances

Use synonyms

in realistic quality.

Also

Linking Words

,in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

modern life,the size of

screens

Correct article usage

the screens

show examples

Use synonyms

TV's

Change noun form

TVs

show examples

or something

else's

Change noun form

else

show examples

,they feel like they are in.

For instance

Linking Words

last

Linking Words

summer,my

favorite

Change the spelling

favourite

show examples

singer came to my country but

unfortunately

Add a comma

unfortunately,

show examples

I couldn't attend because of my

ilness

Correct your spelling

illness

Although

Linking Words

,I was not

Change preposition

show examples

the concert

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

due to

Linking Words

my new

Use synonyms

feel

Wrong verb form

felt

show examples

the same atmosphere as

Correct article usage

the attenders

show examples

attenders

Correct your spelling

attendees

show examples

However

Linking Words

,in terms of

Correct your spelling

organisations

organizators

Add a comma

organizators,

show examples

there are drawbacks

Correct pronoun usage

that outweighs

show examples

outweighs

Correct subject-verb agreement

outweigh

show examples

benefits

Correct article usage

the benefits

show examples

.One of the negative

side

Change to a plural noun

sides

show examples

is that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

loss

Correct article usage

the loss

show examples

of live participants

don't

Correct subject-verb agreement

doesn't

show examples

meet the expenses of

organisation

Add an article

the organisation

show examples

although

Linking Words

organizators

Correct your spelling

organizations

also

Linking Words

get funds from

Use synonyms

and some live sites.

Other

Change the wording

Another

show examples

downside is

sponsor

Correct article usage

the sponsor

show examples

problem.If

participation

Correct article usage

the participation

show examples

percentage is getting down,there are

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

chances to catch any sponsor for their organization.Even,

due to

Linking Words

these problems,some shows and other live

performances

Use synonyms

had stopped their organization.

For example

Linking Words

,the group which is based in Turkey,is famous for

own

Correct pronoun usage

its own

show examples

crowded concerts.But during the

epidemy

Correct your spelling

epidemic

show examples

,they were not to able their shows and that's why

group

Add an article

the group

show examples

broke up. In conclusion,I am firmly convinced that the former outweighs the latter.

aaa Tue Feb 25 2025

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coherence cohesion

Ensure to provide clear transitions between the points discussed to enhance flow. You can use linking words such as 'Furthermore' or 'In addition' to connect your ideas.

task achievement

Expand on your examples a little more to enhance clarity and provide a stronger connection to your point. This will help strengthen the overall argument.

task achievement

You presented both the advantages and disadvantages effectively, showcasing a balanced view of the topic.

coherence cohesion

Your personal example added a nice touch and made your argument more relatable and vivid.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
41
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

239 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

live performances
concerts
advantages
disadvantages
convenience
comfort
cost savings
accessibility
disabilities
remote areas
crowds
lines
re-watch
high-definition video
sound quality
immersive experience
camera angles
virtual reality (VR)
social atmosphere
collective excitement
interact
attendees
technical issues
streaming interruptions
internet connection
emotional impact
economic impact
cultural impact
revenue
local businesses
performance arts
digital entertainment
recognition
hybrid approach
digital streaming
archived
preferences
circumstances

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These days, many people like to watch live performances (such as shows or concerts) at home, either on TV or on a computer, instead of attending in person. Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

It is often said “when is Rome, do as the romans do”. Do you think people should adapt and accept the culture of the country they are visit? Do you think it is possible to learn a culture without learning the language?

To what extent do you agree or disagree that the disadvantages of global homogeneity outweigh its advantages?

Fewer young people play sports these days. Why is this? What can be done to encourage more young people to do sports?

In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?