Expert say older people were happier and healthier in the past because they did more exercise and spent more time with their family and friends, whereas, now many suffer loneliness and health problems. What are the causes of this and what are some solutions?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Experts say that now many elderly

people

Use synonyms

experience loneliness and health problems,

while

Linking Words

in the past they were

more happy

Correct word choice

happier

show examples

and

healthy

Replace the word

healthier

show examples

because they were physically active and spent more time with their

loves

Replace the word

loved

show examples

ones.

This

Linking Words

essay intends to discuss the reasons and solutions to

this

Linking Words

problem. There are many reasons why elderly

people

Use synonyms

do not participate in physical

activites

Correct your spelling

activities

activity

To begin

Linking Words

with,

due to

Linking Words

advancements in technology old

people

Use synonyms

like to spend most of their time in

comfort

Add an article

the comfort

show examples

of their homes. They are more interested in watching a movie,

sport

Correct word choice

or sport

show examples

listen

Wrong verb form

listening

show examples

to news on the TV.

This

Linking Words

has made older generation of

today

Use synonyms

lazy as compared to older generations in the past.

This

Linking Words

has led to an increase in a number of health problems like diabetes, high blood pressure and heart diseases. Modern lifestyle is having a negative effect on

old aged

Add a hyphen

old-aged

show examples

individuals

today

Use synonyms

. The second reason is

lack

Correct article usage

the lack

show examples

of contact with family members. Nowadays, humans live in nuclear families. Individuals usually leave their parents or grandparents to live alone.

This

Linking Words

has led to old individuals feeling isolated and lonely. They do not have anyone to share their feelings.

This

Linking Words

results in

older

Add an article

the older

an older

show examples

generation of

today

Use synonyms

being less happy. The solutions are not easy. Old

people

Use synonyms

should be encouraged to do exercises. They should be made aware of

benefits

Correct article usage

the benefits

show examples

of exercising in old age.

Moreover

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

way they can prevent many

diseses

Correct your spelling

diseases

if they

takecare

Correct your spelling

take care

of their health.

Also

Linking Words

, family members should always keep in contact with the elderly. Even if they are not living with them, they should make a phone call and ask them about

their day to day

Correct your spelling

the day-to-day

show examples

happenings in their lives.

This

Linking Words

will make the older

people

Use synonyms

feel loved and valued.

To conclude

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

there are many reasons why

elderly

Correct article usage

the elderly

show examples

are unhappy and unhealthy

today

Use synonyms

yet

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

I believe

this

Linking Words

problem can be solved if they do engage themselves in exercise and

spent

Wrong verb form

spend

show examples

more time with friends and family.

mansiratbhangu002Wed Feb 26 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your main ideas. For instance, you could mention specific types of exercises beneficial for the elderly or provide statistics on loneliness among seniors.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure proper spacing and grammar. For example, there should be a space between 'exercising in old age.' and 'Moreover'.

coherence and cohesion

Consider using more varied vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement.

task achievement

The introduction clearly states the essay's purpose and the topics to be discussed.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

323 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people believe that it’s important to spend a lot of money on family celebration while others think it’s a waste of money. Discuss both views
Many people agree that it is crucial to spend a large amount of money on family celebrations, but others believe that it's a waste of money. In my opinion, it's acceptable to spend money on family events if you have the budget for it. However, if you don't have the budget, then you shouldn't do it.
6
band
Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
In contemporary society, the debate over the most effective measures to prevent illness and disease has intensified. While I understand why some argue that governmental efforts should primarily target reducing environmental pollution and addressing housing problems, I believe they should not be the sole focus of governmental action.
6
band
A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
In today's world, there is an increasing focus on investing in fossil fuels, such as petrol. However, as the sources of oil are becoming scarce, some people argue that it would be more logical to allocate more funds to develop new sources of power, such as energy from the sun and wind. I completely agree with this statement because the reserves of oil are finite, and these new technologies tend to be more sustainable and eco-friendly than energy from petrol.
8
band
Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is it the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Phone use time among children is higher. There are various reasons behind this increase but advancements in mobile devices and the Internet are usually attributed as the primary cause. Although there are also benefits, the harmful effects of this development on children can outweigh the good ones.
8
band
The leaders of most organisations tend to be older people.However, some argue that younger people tend to make better bosses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Across the world, a common belief is that organizations benefit from being led by experienced older men rather than younger individuals, as they bring wisdom and seasoned judgment. I personally agree that older people tend to make better bosses due to these qualities.

Expert say older people were happier and healthier in the past because they did more exercise and spent more time with their family and friends, whereas, now many suffer loneliness and health problems. What are the causes of this and what are some solutions?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that it’s important to spend a lot of money on family celebration while others think it’s a waste of money. Discuss both views

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is it the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

The leaders of most organisations tend to be older people.However, some argue that younger people tend to make better bosses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?