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Band 7.5

The bar chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in Australia, divided into three categories, from 2001- 2008 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in Australia, divided into three categories, from 2001- 2008 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart below shows the total
number
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 of
minutes
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 (in billions) of telephone calls in Australia, divided into three categories, from 2001- 2008 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. The aforementioned bar chart illustrates the
number
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 of telephone
minutes
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 (in billions) for calls in Australia from 2001 to 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the "local" category remained the highest among all other categories throughout all the years (2001 to 2008).
However
Linking Words
, the lowest out of all three in every year was "mobile." Getting back to the details, the
number
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 of local telephone
minutes
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 had a massive upsurge from 72
billion
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 in 2001 to 90
billion
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 in 2005 but
then
Linking Words
 showed a constant decrease back to 72
billion
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minutes
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 in 2008.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
number
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 of "national and international" calls ranked
second,
Linking Words
consistently rising from 38
billion
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minutes
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 in 2001 to 61
billion
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 in 2008.
Lastly
Linking Words
, the "mobile" category had the least
number
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 of users, with only a mere 2
bullion
Correct your spelling
billion
show examples
minutes
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 in 2001 but increased to 9
billion
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minutes
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 recorded in 2004.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
number
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 showed significant growth, reaching 48
billion
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minutes
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 in 2008.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, minutes, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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