IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is an ongoing debate about whether high
executives
Use synonyms
 should be paid higher
salaries
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 compared to other
workers
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. Some people argue that they definitely should not,
while
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 others, including myself, strongly believe that they should since they have more responsibilities. In
this
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 essay, I will outline my reasons for supporting
this
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 stance. On the one hand,
executives
Use synonyms
 being paid large amounts of money is reasonable since they have more responsibilities. One key reason is that they have more experience than regular employees.
This
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 is because they have been in the industry for many years and are able to make better decisions.
For example
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, if companies do not provide high
salaries
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to
Change preposition
for
show examples
such
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roles
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, professional
executives
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 might not be interested in those positions.
This
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 might have a negative impact on the future of the
company
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.
Furthermore
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, executive
roles
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 like CEOs tend to be the face of the
company
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, too. A major benefit of providing high
salaries
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 to CEOs is that they are bending with the success of the
company
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.
This
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 can be seen in Elon Musk and the companies he either is the CEO of or supports,
for example
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.
Consequently
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, paying
executives
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 high
salaries
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 attracts capable individuals whose contribution might have extremely positive results for the
company
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.
However
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, some critics argue that
executives
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 should not be paid more than
workers
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. They claim that
salaries
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 should be distributed equally because regular employees work harder and for more hours,
for instance
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.
While
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this
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 perspective may have some merit, it overlooks the fact that
executives
Use synonyms
 have already passed from
such
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roles
Use synonyms
, and it is in
workers
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' duty to prove their value and start being paid more. In conclusion,
although
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 some people believe that
workers
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 should have equal
salaries
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 with
executives
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 and CEOs, I firmly believe that they should not.
This
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 is because
such
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roles
Use synonyms
 have more responsibilities, and individuals in these
roles
Use synonyms
 tend to have more years of experience and have already passed from regular worker positions.

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task achievement
While your introduction presents your stance clearly, you might want to rephrase your thesis statement to emphasize the key points you will address in the body paragraphs more explicitly. This helps in setting clear expectations for your reader.
coherence cohesion
Consider adding more transitions between your ideas to enhance the flow of your essay. For instance, using phrases like 'In addition' or 'Moreover' can help connect your points more smoothly and guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
Although you provide relevant examples, some could be expanded upon to offer more depth. For example, when mentioning Elon Musk, consider briefly explaining how his high salary correlates with the success of his companies to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Your essay has a clear position that is maintained throughout, which is a strong aspect of task achievement.
coherence cohesion
You effectively identify both sides of the argument which shows a good understanding of the topic, enhancing the overall quality of your response.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • executive compensation
  • income disparity
  • corporate governance
  • incentive structures
  • ethical considerations
  • competitive advantage
  • demotivation
  • pay structures
  • social inequality
  • talent acquisition
  • company culture
  • economic impact
  • leadership roles
  • employee morale
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