IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1.5

Better Driver Education for Better Driving Habits Is More Effective than Heavier Punishments for Driving Offences. To What Extent Do You Agree or Disagree

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Nowadays, driving is
an
Change the article
a
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 common thing among people. some
peoiple
Correct your spelling
people
believed
Wrong verb form
believe
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 that lessons for good driving
is
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are
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 more
benificial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 than big punishments. If it comes to me
than
Correct your spelling
then
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 I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
its
Correct your spelling
it has
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 been visible on roads that the number of accidents
are
Change the verb form
is
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 growing rapidly, and to control it, the government introduced multiple laws in which they punished drivers with huge
pelenties
Correct your spelling
penalties
 or fines.
While
Linking Words
,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
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 hard to pay for many people,
but
Correct word choice
apply
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most people
paid
Wrong verb form
pay
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it
Change preposition
for it
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.
However
Linking Words
, it
doesen't
Correct your spelling
doesn't
 help to reduce accidents on roads. So there is only one effective solution left,
Linking Words
that
Correct word choice
and that
show examples
 is providing education to drivers for better driving
habbits
Correct your spelling
habits
. Which can help new drivers to learn, how to drive safely and under rules and regulations.

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language
Use correct punctuation and grammar, particularly in terms of singular and plural forms. For example, 'an common thing' should be 'a common thing'.
content
Elaborate more on your main points to provide a clearer picture of your arguments. For example, rigorously discussing how education impacts driving habits can enhance your essay.
coherence
Make sure your ideas flow logically from one to another. You could use linking phrases to help with this, such as 'In addition' or 'Moreover'.
coherence
Conclude effectively by summarizing your main argument clearly, reinforcing your position by restating your agreement with the statement.
task achievement
You present a clear stance on the topic, showing your agreement with the statement. This is important for task achievement.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic and has relevant ideas regarding improving driving habits through education.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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