IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In recent decades, there has been growing debate over whether the working week should be shortened to allow employees to have a prolonged
weak
Correct your spelling
week
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. I strongly agree with the statement, as it could lead to increased productivity, better work-life balance, and improved mental health. The following paragraphs will discuss
this
Linking Words
 issue and provide a reasonable summary. First and foremost, a shorter working week could enhance
work-efficiency
Correct your spelling
work efficiency
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 and reduce stress. When workers have sufficient time to rest, they return to work feeling refreshed and motivated, leading to better performance.
For instance
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, companies in countries Sweden and Iceland have experimented with a
four day
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four-day
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 workweek, and the results indicated higher productivity levels and greater employee satisfaction.
Moreover
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, many studies have shown that employees
work
Correct pronoun usage
who work
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 fewer hours tend to be more focused and flexible.
Secondly
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, many people struggle to find time for family, hobbies, and personal development
due to
Linking Words
 long working hours. With an extra day off, workers could spend more quality time with their loved ones, engage in physical activities, or even pursue additional education. To illustrate, Denmark has the lowest work hours in Europe compared to major countries, the country itself takes care of personnel and not only gives
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 workers a wage, but a social
programs
Fix the agreement mistake
program
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, which covers every social aspect of life. In conclusion, shortening the working week would bring numerous benefits, including higher flexibility, improved
work-efficiency
Correct your spelling
work efficiency
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, and better mental health.
Therefore
Linking Words
, governments and businesses should consider implementing
this
Linking Words
 change for a more efficient and happier workforce.

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task achievement
Try to further develop your main points with more depth and complexity. For instance, explain how improved work-life balance can directly impact productivity and mental health.
task achievement
Ensure that all examples provided explicitly support the argument. For instance, clarify how Denmark's social programs directly relate to the benefits of a shorter workweek.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This will help create a smoother reading experience.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your conclusion succinctly summarizes the key points made in the essay without introducing new ideas for better clarity.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion on the topic and provides relevant reasons to support this stance.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction effectively outlines the main points that will be discussed, which provides a roadmap for the reader.
task achievement
The examples from Sweden, Iceland, and Denmark are relevant and illustrate the points well, showcasing real-world implications of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
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