IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Students should spend a period of time studying and living in a different country to learn language and culture. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people believe that
students
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 who study their
post graduation
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post-graduation
show examples
 in foreign countries enhance their language
skills
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 and learn
local
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the local
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 culture. I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement and state my reasons in
this
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 essay. Spending time with culturally diverse
students
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 in colleges helps to improve their
lingustic
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linguistic
 and cultural
skills
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.
For example
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, some
students
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 are relocating to countries like the UK and Canada for their postgraduate and
undergaraduate
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undergraduate
 studies. During
this
Linking Words
 course of period, they exchange their cultures and traditions.
Moreover
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, some
students
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 are learning international languages
such
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 as French, English and German by mingling with
students
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.
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Additionally
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Additionally,
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 group studies help
students
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 to unite even though there is diversity in cultures. Exploring different countries for studies helps learners to develop life
skills
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such
Linking Words
 as cooking, household chores and first aid management.
For instance
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, People who migrate to different nations for degree courses
starts
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start
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 to learn cooking with the help of
roomates
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roommates
.
Moreover
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, they can learn
variety
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a variety
the variety
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 of cuisines among themselves by sharing their native food
recepies
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recipes
.
Furthermore
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, they
also
Linking Words
 share
life saving
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life-saving
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 first aid
managements
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management
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 which
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 special in their country. In conclusion,
students
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 need to travel
different
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to different
show examples
 nations not only to study but
also
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 to master language and cultural
skills
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. Learning different traditions and cultures from foreign
students
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 helps them to understand the people. So, I strongly
belive
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believe
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 that pursuing higher education
in
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apply
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abroad results in significant improvement in both cognitive and cultural
skills
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.

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea, and that the ideas within each paragraph are logically sequenced and fully developed.
task achievement
Include more detailed explanations or examples to support your main points, which will enhance the depth of your arguments.
language use
Pay attention to spelling and grammar to improve the overall clarity of your writing, as some small inaccuracies can distract from your message.
task achievement
You have a clear stance on the topic and provide reasons to support your viewpoint, which is essential for a high score in task response.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure with an introduction and conclusion, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples to illustrate your points, which adds credibility to your arguments.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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