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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows estimated world literacy rates by region and by gender for the year 2000. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.

The chart below shows estimated world literacy rates by region and by gender for the year 2000. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.
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The
barchart
Correct your spelling
bar chart
 illustrates the percentage of male and female
illiteracy
Use synonyms
 above six nationals for the previous year. As
general
Add an article
a general
show examples
 overview, the
illiteracy
Use synonyms
 rates among
woman
Fix the agreement mistake
women
show examples
 are
significant
Change the adjective
significantly
show examples
 higher than
man
Fix the agreement mistake
men
show examples
,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 lowest level of
inlliteracy
Correct your spelling
illiteracy
literacy
was belong
Wrong verb form
belongs
show examples
 to
develpoed
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developed
 countries.
Besides
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
South
Asia
Use synonyms
, the Arab States and the Sub- Saharan Africa have a high number of them
,.
Change the punctuation
,
.
show examples
 Focusing first
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the area with
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
 rate
od
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
illiteracy
Use synonyms
, more than 50% of
femlae
Correct your spelling
female
females
 living in South
Asia
Use synonyms
 and
Correct article usage
the
show examples
Arab States didn't know how to read and write,
Whereas
Linking Words
, in
Correct article usage
the Sub-saharan
show examples
Sub-saharan
Correct your spelling
Sub-Saharan
show examples
 the number was lower.
Moreover
Linking Words
, females who didn't have
Correct article usage
the opotunity
show examples
opotunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 to access education in those
ares
Correct your spelling
areas
are reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 30%.
In contrast
Linking Words
, some developed countries
has
Verb problem
apply
show examples
mention
Change the verb form
mentioned
show examples
 in
this
Linking Words
 bar chart have
lowest
Add an article
the lowest
show examples
 percentage of
illiteracy
Use synonyms
 rates in
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 just under 10%
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the East
Asia
Use synonyms
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Latin
American
Correct your spelling
America
show examples
.
About
Change preposition
Regarding
show examples
 the female, East
Asia
Use synonyms
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 the more
10
Change preposition
than 10
show examples
% compared to the percentage of Latin
American
Correct your spelling
America
show examples
. In short, the
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 of developed
Correct your spelling
countries
contries
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countries
 have
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
 citizens that
illiterate
Add a missing verb
are illiterate
show examples
 and proponent the
ideas
Fix the agreement mistake
idea
show examples
 of
Correct your spelling
almost
alomost
Correct your spelling
almost
 all
population
Fix the agreement mistake
populations
show examples
 of the areas
arenliterate
Correct your spelling
are literate

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words illiteracy, asia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • literacy rates
  • gender gap
  • regional disparities
  • socio-economic factors
  • male literacy
  • female literacy
  • overviews
  • notable differences
  • highest literacy regions
  • moderate literacy regions
  • lowest literacy regions
  • estimated data
  • educational attainment
  • cultural influences
  • development levels
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