IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The maps below show the village of Stokeford in 1930 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Umar

The maps below show the village of Stokeford in 1930 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Umar
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The two diagrams provide key information about The changes that occurred in Stokeford village during1930 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the first map that the village has undergone too much development . Since the farmland was removed the roads became more organized in 2010 .
Additionally
Linking Words
, the
bridge
Use synonyms
 and post office have remained the same for approximately 80 years. In terms of 2010, the Primary school had expanded by constructing more buildings,
whereas
Linking Words
 on the opposite side, the shops have been demolished.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the large house was redeveloped into a retirement.
However
Linking Words
 , In the north part of Stokeford was a
bridge
Use synonyms
 , which connected roads,and remained untouched during showed time . Below the
bridge
Use synonyms
 , nearby towards the centre was a Farmland home with many buildings. In 1930 there was one main road that passed through the
bridge
Use synonyms
 ,
while
Linking Words
 in 2010 there were many roads .

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words bridge with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the seventh paragraph.
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