IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Movies and tv shows are a good way to study history despite their lack of historical accuracy at times. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
show examples
 generation,
Use synonyms
history
Correct article usage
the history
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 of
accient phenomenom
Correct your spelling
ancient phenomena
 can
be access
Change the verb form
be accessed
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 in many ways like through
story
Use synonyms
teller
Fix the agreement mistake
tellers
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, books,
documentary
Fix the agreement mistake
documentaries
show examples
 or movies.
However
Linking Words
 even in what ways the accuracy is still questionable
specially
Replace the word
especially
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 those events happened
hundred
Correct article usage
a hundred
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 years ago. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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 I
well
Correct your spelling
will
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 discuss my opinion about agreeing that it is better to learn
history
Use synonyms
 through movies rather than reading books. It's so hard to understand a
story
Use synonyms
 without
action
Correct article usage
the action
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 or presentation of every cast in the
story
Use synonyms
.Aside from that it gives amusement to viewers. The
in
Change preposition
apply
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actment
Correct your spelling
enactment
action
 of every
happenings
Change to a singular noun
happening
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 in the
story
Use synonyms
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
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 an
over all
Correct your spelling
overall
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 perspective of what really happened before.
Although
Linking Words
 some actions or props they used were just
addition
Fix the agreement mistake
additions
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 to give
spices
Fix the agreement mistake
spice
show examples
Change preposition
to
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the movie
but
Correct word choice
apply
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the theme of the movie is still there.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 documentary is one of the best
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
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 to study
history
Use synonyms
. I have watched
to
Replace the word
too
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 many
documentary
Change to a plural noun
documentaries
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 because I love
history
Use synonyms
 and I could say most
producer
Fix the agreement mistake
producers
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based on facts.They interviewed people who really take part in
history
Use synonyms
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
for example
Linking Words
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
World War II
that was
Verb problem
which
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 happened 80 years ago. The maker of the documentation
travel
Wrong verb form
travelled
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 around the world to talk to soldiers who participated
during
Change preposition
in
show examples
Add an article
the
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war.They accumulate
also
Linking Words
 photos and videos from photographers.They do these things
with
Change preposition
at
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 their expense in order to give viewers a
fact
Correct your spelling
fast
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 and reliable information.
Although
Linking Words
 some movies and shows were questionable on
there
Correct your spelling
their
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authentecy
Correct your spelling
authenticity
authentic
 viewers can still figure out through the name of the maker or producer of the shows.Nowadays truth is impossible to hide
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 its the era of social media where everybody can post any
videos
Fix the agreement mistake
video
show examples
.

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task achievement
The introduction could benefit from clearer articulation of your thesis statement. Consider explicitly stating your position on the topic right at the end of the introduction.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that outlines the main idea of that paragraph, which will help guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
There are several minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing; proofreading for these issues could enhance clarity and professionalism in your writing.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view by discussing both movies and documentaries as tools for studying history, which shows critical thinking.
task achievement
You provided examples to support your points, particularly regarding documentaries, which adds depth to your argument and makes it more engaging.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • historical accuracy
  • dramatization
  • narrative
  • themes
  • emotional engagement
  • reenactments
  • contextual understanding
  • critical thinking
  • visual storytelling
  • depicted
  • factual history
  • creative liberties
  • engaging ways
What to do next:
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