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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table shows the percentage of government expenditure on health care in five countries in 2006 as well as the proportions of 24-30-year-olds working in medical services. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table shows the percentage of government expenditure on health care in five countries in 2006 as well as the proportions of 24-30-year-olds working in medical services. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The table chart illustrates the proportion of government spending on health services in Poland, Finland, Iceland, Spain and Italy and the ratio of 24-30 years old working in
medical
Add an article
the medical
show examples
 sector in 2006.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that
Italian
Correct article usage
the Italian
show examples
 government
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 the highest percentile of expenses on health care,
while
Linking Words
 the Polish authorities made
least
Change the article
the least
show examples
 expenditure. Polish adults were more engaged in
medical
Add an article
the medical
show examples
 sector. By observing the chart, it can be seen that
Italian
Correct article usage
the Italian
show examples
 bureaucracy utilised 27% of their income on health-related services. Iceland and Spain spend almost similar
proportion
Fix the agreement mistake
proportions
show examples
 in their countries for providing medical amenities to their residents accounting
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 13% and 11%
Linking Words
accordingly
Rephrase
respectively
show examples
.
The
Correct article usage
A
show examples
 difference of 4% was noticed between the expenditure of Poland and Finland recorded
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 5% and 9%. Furtherance, a half proportion of Polish people were employed in health services, followed by Italy and Spain noticed to 40% and 34%.
However
Linking Words
, a total of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half
young
Change preposition
of young
show examples
 people were engaged in Finland and Iceland
for assisting
Change preposition
to assist
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals with medical treatment.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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