IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph and table show the average monthly temperature and annual hours of sunshine in three major cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and table show the average monthly temperature and annual hours of sunshine in three major cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given line chart illustrates the change in the monthly
temperature
Use synonyms
 of three big cities in the world,
while
Linking Words
 the table shows the average number of
hours
Use synonyms
 of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in a
year
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, there is no significant change in the
temperature
Use synonyms
 of Sydney during the
year
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 both
London
Use synonyms
 and New
York
Use synonyms
 witness much extreme weather.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
hours
Use synonyms
 of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in both New
York
Use synonyms
 and Sydney are relatively equal
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and are both double compared with
London
Use synonyms
. Looking at Sydney, the weather here is relatively warm during the whole
year
Use synonyms
 at around 15
degrees
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C
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, apart from summer, when the
temperature
Use synonyms
 is under 20
degrees
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C
Use synonyms
 from May to September.
In addition
Linking Words
, its number of
hours
Use synonyms
 of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 is
second,
Linking Words
at 2473
hours
Use synonyms
 per
year
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. Regarding
London
Use synonyms
 and New
York
Use synonyms
, the weather in these two cities is rather extreme, with half a
year
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, from September to March, the
temperature
Use synonyms
 is under 15
degrees
Use synonyms
C
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,
while
Linking Words
 it is extremely hot in July with the
temperature
Use synonyms
 around 25 to 30
degrees
Use synonyms
C
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.
In addition
Linking Words
,
London
Use synonyms
 has the lowest number of
hours
Use synonyms
 of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in a
year
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, with 1158
hours
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,
while
Linking Words
 New
York
Use synonyms
 has the most
hours
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 of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 during a
year
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, with 2535
hours
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition, while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words temperature, hours, sunshine, year, london, york, degrees, c with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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