IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The plans below shows the village of Pebbleton twenty years ago and now

The two maps show changes made to
Pebbleton
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 over a 20-year period.
Overall
Linking Words
, the western part of
Pebbleton
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 underwent significant development and modernization,
while
Linking Words
 the eastern
side
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 remained largely unchanged. Twenty years ago, the village had few buildings: houses and a lighthouse on the north
side
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, and an old fort and film studio on the west
side
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. A school was located between the coast road and the river on the southern
side
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. The eastern part of
Pebbleton
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, including the old fort, remained as it was. Currently, the western
side
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 of
Pebbleton
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 has been significantly altered with the addition of new facilities. In the northern part, a children’s playground has been built where the old fort used to be, and the lighthouse remains unchanged. The number of houses has doubled, and a community
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 has been added to the west
side
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, replacing the film studio. The southern and eastern sides have remained the same.

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task achievement
You provided a clear overview of the changes in Pebbleton, but consider expanding your introduction to provide more context about the significance of the changes over 20 years. A brief comparison in the introduction could enhance clarity.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is well-structured, but transitions between sentences can be improved for better flow. Consider using linking words or phrases to connect ideas more smoothly.
task achievement
While you have included specific examples, adding one or two more details about the types of houses or the purpose of the community center could strengthen your argument and show a deeper understanding of the changes made.
task achievement
The essay effectively details the key developments in the western part of Pebbleton and clearly indicates what has remained unchanged, demonstrating a good understanding of the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your writing is generally clear and makes good use of comparative language, which helps to convey the changes effectively between the two time periods.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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