IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people today work long hours, leaving them with little time for leisure activities. Why is this happened? What problem does it cause?

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In the era of
inflation
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, it is
neccesrey
Correct your spelling
necessary
 to do more
work
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. majority of
people
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 working huge
hours
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 and there
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 less
time
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 for
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 other
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
. Behind
this
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problem
Add a comma
problem,
show examples
 there are many
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
such
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 as
inflation
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 and it cause
numerious
Correct your spelling
numerous
 of
issuses
Correct your spelling
issues
. In the upcoming paragraphs , I will shed the light on all of these
reasos
Correct your spelling
reasons
 and
issuses
Correct your spelling
issues
.
To begin
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 with, the biggest reason behind
this
Linking Words
 problem is
inflation
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.
Due to
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inflation
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,
people
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 have to do overtime at their
work
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. Owing
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
, the working
hours
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 they are doing
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 not sufficient to cover all the
expensive
Replace the word
expenses
show examples
such
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 as
morgadges
Correct your spelling
mortgages
,
groccery
Correct your spelling
grocery
 and other important
expensives
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expenses
expensive
. Nowadays, all the
expensives
Correct your spelling
expenses
expensive
 are increasing but their salaries are
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 so, they are not able to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
 their all dreams with
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 working
hours
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.
Therefore
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, they are doing more
work
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 from their
schedule
Replace the word
scheduled
show examples
time
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.
Moveover
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Moreover
,
due to
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 doing excessive
work
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people
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 are suffering from various health problems.
Firstly
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, when
individules
Correct your spelling
individuals
 are working more
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 their
schedule
Replace the word
scheduled
show examples
hours
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 they go through
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
lots of stress, which can lead
brain
Change preposition
to brain
show examples
 problems. For
emample
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example
, a study
that is
Linking Words
 conducted by WHO shows that
people
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 who are working more
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 50
hours
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 per week, they are suffering more from hypertension as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to those folks who are working their
schedule
Replace the word
scheduled
show examples
hours
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. Afterward, during
overtime
Add a comma
overtime,
show examples
 they are getting too exhausted.
Thus
Linking Words
, they have less
time
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 to do physical activities which can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
become a serious
peoblem
Correct your spelling
problem
 in future because,
people
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 are doing already less movement at
office
Add an article
the office
an office
show examples
 or at their
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work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
 so,
they
Correct word choice
so they
show examples
 need
time
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 for their physical health.
To sum up
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, it is so often to do overtime nowadays, in the case of, to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
 their expensive. Because the
expensives
Correct your spelling
expenses
expensive
 are too high
due to
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inflation
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.
However
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, it
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
 many problems
such
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serious
Change preposition
as serious
show examples
 health
issuse
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issues
issue
, less
time
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 for
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 body and so on.

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language
Ensure you proofread your essay for grammatical and typographical errors, such as 'neccesrey' which should be 'necessary'.
language
Try to include more varied and precise vocabulary to enhance your essay. Replacing terms like 'expensives' with 'expenses' will improve clarity.
structure
Make sure your paragraphs are logically structured, with clear topic sentences. Each paragraph should clearly link to the previous one while addressing specific points.
content
Develop your conclusions by summarizing the key points and potentially suggesting solutions to the problems highlighted.
content
The essay addresses the question and explains the reasons for longer working hours and their consequences, showing a clear understanding of the topic.
structure
The essay is structured into clear paragraphs, making it easier to follow the flow of ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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