IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below gives information about the number of tourists who visited five different countries between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about the number of tourists who visited five different countries between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line graph
illustartes
Correct your spelling
illustrates
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of international tourists who visited five
countries
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 ( the United States of America, France, Malaysia, Brazil, and Egypt ), in a 15-year period, from 1995 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the USA were the most popular destination for the
traveler
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traveller
show examples
troughout
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throughout
 the period,
while
Linking Words
 Brazil and Egypt were the least visited
countries
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. In 1995, the
number
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 of
USA's
Change noun form
USA
show examples
 visitors was about 70
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
,
then
Linking Words
 the
number
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 began to increase gradually until reaching its peak of approximately 90
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 by the end of the period.
Moreover
Linking Words
, France and Malaysia show an upward trend, both
countries
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 started below 40
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. After which,
witness
Wrong verb form
witnessed
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
growth in tourists
number
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,
finshing
Correct your spelling
finishing
 at approximately 80 and 50
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
respectivly
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respectively
 by 2010. In
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of the remained
countries
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,
Brazil's
Change noun form
Brazil
show examples
 and Egypt show a
smiliar
Correct your spelling
similar
 trend, the
number
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 of
traveler
Change to a plural noun
travelers
show examples
 were almost 10 million and continued to rise slightly, reaching nearly 20 million by 2010.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, countries, millions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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