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Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph gives information about the number of Iranian, Greek and Turkish students who enrolled at Sheffield University between 2005 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph gives information about the number of Iranian, Greek and Turkish students who enrolled at Sheffield University between 2005 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line graph displays the
number
Use synonyms
 of
students
Use synonyms
 from Iran, Greece, and Turkey who enrolled at Sheffield University from 2005 to 2009.  
Overall
Linking Words
, Greek
students
Use synonyms
 had the highest
number
Use synonyms
 who enrolled at Sheffield University in the beginning.
While
Linking Words
 there was a dramatic decrease
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 from Greece throughout the given period,
students
Use synonyms
 from Iran and Turkey increased rapidly.   In 2005, the
number
Use synonyms
 of Greek
students
Use synonyms
 stood at 180
students
Use synonyms
 and rose slightly after one year to reach around 50
students
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, there was a sudden decline for the following year, becoming the second-highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
students
Use synonyms
, equal to Iran at about 70
students
Use synonyms
.
Then
Linking Words
 they remained steady for one year before reaching the lowest point at up 40 in 2009.  
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 from Turkey grew significantly by 100, from 20 to 120
students
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there was
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rapid growth for Iranian
students
Use synonyms
, who started at 40
students
Use synonyms
, to reach 80
students
Use synonyms
 in 2008.
Then
Linking Words
 the rate saw a steep climb to 160
students
Use synonyms
, eventually.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, students with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rapidly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Enrolled
  • Enrollments
  • Trend
  • Steady increase
  • Initial increase
  • Decline
  • Sharp increase
  • Peaking
  • Noteworthy comparison
  • Contrasting trends
  • Period
  • Given period
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