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Band 5.5

Technology is becoming increasingly prevalent In the world today. In the not too distant future, technology will completely replace the teacher in the classroom. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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The use of
technology
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 is increasing rapidly in the modern world. Growing technological influence can even be seen in the
classroom
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. The
argument
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 that
technology
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 will completely replace the
teacher
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 in the
classroom
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 is a subject
that is
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 both supported and refuted by many. Both sides of
this
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argument
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 will be analyzed before a reasoned conclusion is drawn.
Firstly
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, it is easy to see the progressive rate at which
technology
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 is able to mimic the teaching abilities of human beings.
For example
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, several iPhone applications are able to hold the attention of young children for hours at a time,
while
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 concurrently teaching them things.
Thus
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,
it is clear that
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 on a small scale, machines can act as effective teachers. The possibility
for
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of
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 a robotic
teacher
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 in the future can
therefore
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 be seen.
However
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, on the other side of
this
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argument
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, it must be remembered that a
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teacher powered
Add a hyphen
teacher-powered
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 by artificial intelligence would have little to no control over
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
his
her
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 students.
For example
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, it is commonly understood that children require the watchful eye of a
teacher
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 to ensure that they are indeed completing their class work and not fooling around during class time. Unfortunately,
this
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 is something that a robotic
teacher
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 simply cannot provide.
Thus
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,
this
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 makes it clear why the
argument
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 that
technology
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 will never completely replace the
teacher
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 in the
classroom
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 could
also
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 be possible. In summary, both sides of the
argument
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 regarding the possibility of a technologically driven
classroom
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 have strong support.
However
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, after analyzing the two camps
it is clear that
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 the idea of having a class run entirely by a machine is unlikely to materialize anytime soon. As
such
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, it is predicted that the plausibility of
technology
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-based
classroom
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 teachers will remain weak.

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to illustrate your points further, especially in the section discussing the limitations of AI teachers.
task achievement
Ensure that all points made in the essay directly relate to the main argument. For example, while discussing robotic teachers, clarify how this directly impacts the education system compared to traditional teaching.
coherence and cohesion
Strengthen your conclusion by summarizing the key points more definitively, stating your position clearly to reinforce your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Use more varied linking words to enhance the flow and connection between different ideas and paragraphs. This will improve the overall coherence of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction is well-structured, clearly presenting the topic and providing a preview of the argument.
task achievement
You have effectively discussed both sides of the argument, demonstrating an understanding of the complexity of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • prevalent
  • interactive tools
  • human interaction
  • emotional intelligence
  • adaptability
  • personalized learning
  • democratizing education
  • integration
  • Artificial Intelligence (AI)
  • machine learning
  • real-time feedback
  • fostering
  • critical thinking
  • mentorship
  • tech-driven
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