IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram below shows the life cycle of a frog. Beka

The diagram below shows the life cycle of a frog. Beka
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The process diagram below illustrates the life path of a
frog
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
 , it is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 8-stage, natural, cyclical process. It begins with the meeting of two frogs during mating season and ends with becoming an
adult
Use synonyms
frog
Use synonyms
. First of all, two
adult
Use synonyms
 frogs meet during mating season,
after
Correct word choice
and after
show examples
 that female
frog
Use synonyms
 lays eggs
under water
Correct your spelling
underwater
show examples
 in their frogspawn. After 7-10 days have passed little
tadpoles
Use synonyms
 are born from the
caviar’s
Change noun form
caviar
show examples
,
with
Correct word choice
and with
show examples
this
Linking Words
 begins
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 tadpole
stages
Correct the article-noun agreement
stage
show examples
. At
this
Linking Words
phase
Add a comma
phase,
show examples
tadpoles
Use synonyms
 feed on algae.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, after 6 weeks
tadpoles
Use synonyms
 are getting bigger and develop paws. Following that, after 9 weeks,
tadpoles
Use synonyms
 develop front legs and develop four legs, but still swim
under water
Correct your spelling
underwater
show examples
. After 12 weeks
tadpoles
Use synonyms
 become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
froglet
Fix the agreement mistake
froglets
show examples
,
starts
Correct subject-verb agreement
start
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
pulmonary breathing and begin to walk on land, but sometimes they can swim in
water
Add an article
the water
show examples
. During
this
Linking Words
 period froglet become a young
frog
Use synonyms
 and after 4 years
grow
Correct subject-verb agreement
grows
show examples
 into
Use synonyms
adult
Add an article
an adult
show examples
frog
Use synonyms
. In general, it takes 4 years to become an
adult
Use synonyms
frog
Use synonyms

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words frog, adult, tadpoles with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: