IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below gives information on the percentage of Canadians gave money to charitable organisations by age range for the years 2000 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information on the percentage of Canadians gave money to charitable organisations by age range for the years 2000 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The chart below shows seem
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
Canadians
Change preposition
of Canadians
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
donation
Replace the word
donate
show examples
 money
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to charity.In
diagram
Correct article usage
the diagram
show examples
 can be seen statistics
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 15
years
Use synonyms
 from 2000 to 2015
years
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
,diagrams seem to
Add a missing verb
be statistic
show examples
statistic
Fix the agreement mistake
statistics
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
when
years
Use synonyms
 were donated goods money from
youngs
Correct your spelling
young
show examples
 and old
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
.And can seem
what’s
Correct word choice
that’s
show examples
 in
2000
Change the article
the 2000
show examples
year
Use synonyms
Canadians
Replace the word
Canadian
show examples
 donors
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
were more . From 50
Use synonyms
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 2000
year
Use synonyms
 Canadians which
donation
Replace the word
donated
show examples
 money
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 charity
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the most .If
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
from
Change preposition
to
show examples
24
Correct your spelling
the 24-year
year
Use synonyms
 statistics
2000
Change preposition
in 2000
show examples
 and 2015
year
Use synonyms
 ,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
 in 2000
year
Use synonyms
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 20%,
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is twice as much
than
Change preposition
as
show examples
2015
Change the article
the 2015
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 .And from 25 to 50
years
Use synonyms
 can say
what’s
Unnecessary verb
what
show examples
 their growth was stabile and
precent
Correct your spelling
per cent
present
prevent
 between them was different by 5
precent
Correct your spelling
per cent
.Max 2000
year
Use synonyms
 reached from 38% and minimum 20%. Already from 50 to 65
years
Use synonyms
 donation was more in 2015
years
Use synonyms
 .Max 2015
year
Use synonyms
 reached 37% and minimum 11%.
Also
Linking Words
 from 50
Use synonyms
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
 compared to 2000 and 2015
years
Use synonyms
 was
rise
Correct article usage
a rise
show examples
stability
Change preposition
in stability
show examples
.Between
then
Linking Words
 was different
also
Linking Words
 in 5 %.Very peak
2000
Change preposition
in 2000
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 was 38%
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 in Keats 35 and 50
Use synonyms
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
, and in 2015
year
Use synonyms
 very peak was 37%,it was old
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 which was more
50
Change preposition
than 50
show examples
years
Use synonyms
.
Correct word choice
old.
show examples

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words years, year with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "compare" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • age range
  • charitable organisations
  • fluctuates
  • notable changes
  • participation
  • considerable decrease
  • contrast
  • consistent increase
  • middle age groups
  • peak
  • notable drop
  • shift
  • financial priorities
  • economic circumstances
  • demographic
What to do next:
Look at other essays: