The increase in People’s life expectancy means that they have to work older to pay for their retirement. One alternative is that people start to work at a young age. Is this alternative a positive or a negative development?

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To begin

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with, life expectancy has increased

due to

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improved

Correct article usage

the improved

show examples

life style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

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of people around the world.

Therefore

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, the number of elderly increases in different

soicitieis

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societies

especially in developed countries. People now tend to

acheive

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achieve

their goals at a younger age, starting jobs when they are still young. As far as

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

retirement expenses

Change the verb form

are

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concerned, it should not be

the

Correct article usage

show examples

fear from an early age. Naturally, nobody knows for how many years they will be living. I believe it is a negative development because making a

deceision

Correct your spelling

decision

in my early years, in the present for something in the future. In the case of people living with wealthy families,

this

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should not be their biggest fear because nowadays money can be accessed easily,

throught

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through

different sources,

relaying

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relying

show examples

on a 9-5 job for the income in

this

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generation is not a question. Because you can freelance, make your opportunities even in the future during retirement. In conclusion, I totally do not agree that it is a positive development but rather it is a negative development because naturally the

circumcatnces

Correct your spelling

circumstances

this

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decade differ.

leenaaldabbasMon Mar 31 2025

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task achievement

Clarify the relationship between life expectancy and the need for early work in your introduction. Consider providing specific examples or statistics to strengthen your main points.

coherence and cohesion

Improve transitions between ideas to enhance logical flow. For example, using phrases like 'Furthermore' or 'In addition' can help connect your thoughts more smoothly.

coherence and cohesion

Rephrase sentences for better clarity. For instance, instead of 'Naturally, nobody knows for how many years they will be living,' you could say, 'It's difficult to predict how long any individual will live.'

task achievement

You present a clear opinion on the issue, making it easy for readers to understand your stance.

task achievement

Your essay addresses the topic directly and explores the implications of an increased life expectancy on work and retirement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

182 words

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The increase in People’s life expectancy means that they have to work older to pay for their retirement. One alternative is that people start to work at a young age. Is this alternative a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Children in rural areas are being left behind in their academic development. Why is this is the case? What solutions can you suggest?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problem. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

The government should ban smoking in all public places, even though this would restrict some other people's freedoms. Do you agree or disagree?

Email is a fast and convenient way to communicate, and written letters aren’t needed anymore. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Semi-Formal Letter Prompt: "You recently attended a workshop and would like to thank the organizer. Write a letter to the organizer. In your letter, you should: 1.Express your gratitude for the workshop. 2.Describe what you learned or found valuable. 3.Suggest how the workshop could be improved."