IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010. Assel

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010. Assel
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The bar chart illustrates the expenditure of two countries,
France
Use synonyms
 and the UK, on consumer goods in 2010, measured in pounds sterling. The categories include cars,
computers
Use synonyms
, books,
perfume
Use synonyms
 and cameras.
Overall
Linking Words
, The United Kingdom
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 more than
France
Use synonyms
 on consumer goods, except for
computers
Use synonyms
 and
perfume
Use synonyms
. The highest expenditure for both countries was on cars,
while
Linking Words
 the lowest was on
perfume
Use synonyms
. Notably, The UK
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 approximately £450,000 on cars, which was slightly higher than
France
Use synonyms
’s 400,000 pounds sterling. An upward trend was on
Add an article
the book
a book
show examples
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
 in the UK almost £400,000,
while
Linking Words
France
Use synonyms
spends
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 just 300,000 pounds.
However
Linking Words
,
France
Use synonyms
 allocated more funds
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
computers
Use synonyms
, cameras and
computers
Use synonyms
 a little bit
Linking Words
similarly
Change the word
similar
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with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 each other in two countries.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the UK’s spending on cameras
nearly
Add a missing verb
is nearly
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 double that of
France
Use synonyms
, reaching £350,000 compared to
France
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’s £150,000. For
perfume
Use synonyms
,
France
Use synonyms
 spent around £200,000, which was significantly higher than
UK’s
Correct article usage
the UK’s
show examples
 expenditure of almost £150,000.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words france, computers, perfume with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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