IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familiar with. Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Today's world is a mix of different kinds of
people
Use synonyms
 with myriad personality traits.
While
Linking Words
 some individuals enjoy being outgoing, others find peace in solitude and doing mundane tasks. I personally believe that finding
balance
Add an article
a balance
the balance
show examples
 between the two is vital to
live
Change the verb form
living
show examples
 a rather enjoyable life. Exploring the views of extroverted
people
Use synonyms
. First and foremost,
adrenaline
Correct article usage
the adrenaline
show examples
 rush, which is something that makes them feel more satisfied, often times which includes being outgoing and constantly trying new
things
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 not only gives them a sense of purpose but
also
Linking Words
 makes them feel content.
Next,
Linking Words
routine tends to be monotonous for
such
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
hence
Linking Words
 they seek something to look forward to
such
Linking Words
 as trying a new dish.
For example
Linking Words
, I personally am a very extroverted person, having something to look forward to, something as small as cooking new food or trying ice cream at a new place makes me feel delighted. Now for the
people
Use synonyms
 who enjoy doing routine tasks and familiar
things
Use synonyms
. Primarily, having
things
Use synonyms
 figured out and knowing what to do
next,
Linking Words
gives a sense of security and control which is very important for some
people
Use synonyms
.
Such
Linking Words
 as knowing where to go to purchase groceries or having
things
Use synonyms
 organized in the usual manner. Doing the same
things
Use synonyms
 repeatedly and in the same manner helps
quite
Correct your spelling
quiet
show examples
 the mind, especially if someone overthinks a lot.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they like to avoid taking any risks as the outcome is unknown. I feel like having a balance between both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
attitudes is crucial as it helps develop harmony within ourselves. It is important to indulge ourselves
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 new hobbies but it is equally important to train ourselves to
having
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 fun doing daily familiar tasks.
Additionally
Linking Words
, we should make sure that we feel content in whatever we're doing and make the smallest task enjoyable. In conclusion,
Although
Linking Words
 being adventurous and going out is healthy
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
staying in and enjoying the ordinary is
also
Linking Words
 of significance. As a wise man once said, "
anything
Capitalize word
Anything
show examples
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
 excess is bad"
Linking Words
similarly
Capitalize word
Similarly
show examples
, finding a balance is necessary for inner peace.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to illustrate your points. While you mention your personal experience, adding more diverse examples could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that sums up the main idea to enhance clarity. This will also help to improve the logical flow of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction is engaging, but ensure that your thesis statement clearly outlines the discussion points you'll cover. This helps guide the reader.
task achievement
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your points and presents a strong closing thought, which leaves a lasting impression.
task achievement
The personal touch in your essay, through sharing your experiences, makes your writing relatable and engaging for the reader.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Novelty
  • Routine
  • Comfort zone
  • Risk-taker
  • Risk-averse
  • Enrichment
  • Personal growth
  • Innovation
  • Creativity
  • Stability
  • Tradition
  • Habit
  • Familiarity
  • Personal enrichment
  • Life stages
  • Fulfilling
What to do next:
Look at other essays: