IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Animals also have emotions and feel equal pain as humans. We should stop all pharmaceutical companies from doing trials on innocent animals. Give your opinion.

Before introducing any new kinds of medicine trials are done on
animals
Use synonyms
. It is always a debated subject if it is the right thing to do. In my opinion, putting the lives of these innocent
beings
Use synonyms
 in danger should be stopped.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, both domestic and wild creatures are living
beings
Use synonyms
 and they do have feelings like happiness, pain, anger,
love
Correct word choice
and love
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
 humans cannot understand those emotions in some instances, it is not true that
animals
Use synonyms
 cannot feel anything.
Also
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, consent is the most
in
Correct word choice
important in
show examples
 every procedure. But, in
case
Correct article usage
the case
show examples
 of
animals
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, consent is not taken and the trials are performed.
Similarly
Linking Words
, no individual could guarantee that the experiment would be successful. If the procedure
become
Wrong verb form
becomes
show examples
 unsuccessful,innocent living
beings
Use synonyms
 could go through severe pain. It is the responsibility of the population that every
Use synonyms
animals
Change to a singular noun
animal
show examples
 be treated well.
Animals
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 do show
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their emotions but
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 should not be ignored. In my opinion, every individual is asked for their consent before even a research, all the companies should stop targeting
animals
Use synonyms
 for their trials as those innocent
beings
Use synonyms
 cannot speak up for themselves. In summary,
animals
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 do have feelings and
according to
Linking Words
 my view, those feelings should not be ignored
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 experiments.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
 those pharmaceutical businesses using
animals
Use synonyms
 for their trial and error could be punished by law.

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas and provide more specific examples from personal experience or well-known instances related to animal testing.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea, and the points are well-connected between sentences for better flow.
coherence and cohesion
Use a wider range of vocabulary and various sentence structures to enhance the overall quality of the writing.
task achievement
The essay makes a clear stance against animal testing, which is a strong viewpoint.
task achievement
The essay addresses the emotional aspect of animals effectively, showing empathy and moral concern.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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