In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples
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What works well
2You have clearly articulated the two perspectives on the ageing population issue, which is essential for addressing the task.
Your essay concludes with a thoughtful reflection on the value of the elderly, capturing an important sentiment that resonates with many readers.
Improvement Suggestions
3Consider providing a clearer overview of the main points you will discuss in your essay in the introduction. It helps set expectations for the reader.
When presenting arguments, ensure to develop them more fully with examples and elaboration. Some points feel a bit underdeveloped.
Make a clearer distinction between your two perspectives. Label them as 'advantages' and 'disadvantages' in the body paragraphs to enhance clarity.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?