IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

In some places, young people find it difficult to communicate with older people. Why is this? What are the solutions? (เขียนอย่างน้อย 10 บรรทัด)

In some places, young
people
Use synonyms
 hard to talk with older
people
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is because they don’t have much experience
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 speaking. Some young
people
Use synonyms
 feel nervous when they
talking
Wrong verb form
talk
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 to older
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
. They maybe don’t know what word to use or how to say something polite. Sometimes they
scared
Add a missing verb
are scared
show examples
 to make
mistake
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mistakes
show examples
 and older
people
Use synonyms
maybe
Correct your spelling
may
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 not understand them.
Also
Linking Words
,
generation
Correct article usage
the generation
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 gap
make
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makes
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 it more difficult to talk. Older
people
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 have different
idea
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ideas
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, thinking and
style
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styles
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 of
speak
Wrong verb form
speaking
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. They use different
word
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words
show examples
 and
way
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ways
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 of
explain
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explaining
show examples
thing
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things
show examples
. So young
people
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 feel shy or feel not good enough to speak. They
also
Linking Words
 feel pressure because they want to show respect but don't know how.One way to solve
this
Linking Words
 is learning English in school, with more speaking and listening
activity
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activities
show examples
. Or they can go tutor for practice speaking and learn about how to talk with different
people
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. Parents and
teacher
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teachers
show examples
 can help too by
let
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letting
show examples
 young
people
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 speak more and support them. More practice
make
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makes
show examples
 them more confident to talk with everyone, not only old
people
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 but
also
Linking Words
 new
people
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 or
foreigner
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foreigners
show examples
. If young
people
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 try more, they will improve and feel more comfortable
to speak
Change the verb form
speaking
show examples
 but in my
opinon
Correct your spelling
opinion
 is
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 be nervous or
scare
Wrong verb form
scared
show examples
 to speak because you just need to have
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 confidence to speak with
people
Use synonyms
 and
people
Use synonyms
 and some
people
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not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
 care about your grammar.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to structure your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion to enhance readability.
task achievement
Use varied vocabulary and grammatical structures to express your ideas more clearly and effectively.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or personal experiences to support your points, which can strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
You have addressed the main reasons why young people might find it difficult to communicate with older individuals, which is an essential aspect of the task.
task achievement
You presented some potential solutions that are practical and relevant, showing an understanding of the issues at hand.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological proficiency
  • communication gap
  • digital tools
  • worldviews
  • common ground
  • contemporary slang
  • informal language
  • misunderstandings
  • social hierarchy
  • cultural norms
  • stereotypes
  • prejudices
  • open communication
  • out of touch
  • inexperienced
  • effective communication
  • intergenerational programs
  • cross-generational activities
  • mutual respect
  • active listening
What to do next:
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