Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Many believe that
music
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can integrate
people
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across the
world
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from different cultures and societies. I firmly agree with
this
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notion with the belief that
music
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is universal.
People
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of all
demographies
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demographics
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are attracted by
music
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irrespective of their age, culture or
language
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. In today's interconnected
world
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,
music
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is reaching globally across
the
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apply
show examples
borders rather than being restricted in a local geography.
For example
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, some popular musicians like Taylor Swift and
K-Pop
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K-pop
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band
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bands
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have their reach across all the nations. Recently, Taylor Swift organised a
world
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tour
,
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apply
show examples
and performed at live
concert
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concerts
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in more than thirty countries, creating a strong community of
music
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lovers from all sections of society. One of the
reason
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reasons
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for
music
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trascending
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transcending
across
the
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apply
show examples
boundaries is that
music
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has no
language
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. Musical instruments like guitar,
violen
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violin
or piano can be played to melodious tunes without learning a foreign
language
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.
Music
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has
it's
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its
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own universal
language
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which is
same
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the same
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across the
world
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.
For example
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, various chords like A major,
B
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and B
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minor are
same
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the same
show examples
for instruments everywhere.
This
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integrates the populations without any barriers of culture,
language
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, and age .
Music
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helps many to relax,
sooth
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soothe
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and get stress-free.
To conclude
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,
music
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has universal appeal and it binds
people
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across all cultures and ages.
People
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from all over the
world
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join the
music
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concerts to relax, enjoy and have a good time.

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task achievement
Try to provide more diverse examples or contexts related to music's unifying role; this will strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure correct spelling of words such as 'transcending' and 'violin' to enhance the overall professionalism of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Consider adding more transitional phrases to improve the flow between ideas.
task achievement
Clear and strong agreement with the topic; you articulated your stance well.
task achievement
Your examples, especially regarding Taylor Swift, were relevant and illustrated your points effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
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