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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives the percentage of social media users by age in Jamestown in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features. (Anelya1)

The chart below gives the percentage of social media users by age in Jamestown in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features. (Anelya1)
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The
given
Verb problem
apply
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pie chart represents the number of social
networks
Change the noun form
network
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users
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
 age group for citizens of Jamestown in 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that
primary
Correct article usage
the primary
show examples
users
Use synonyms
 of digital media
was
Change the verb form
were
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 teenagers and adults
while
Linking Words
 the minority
users
Use synonyms
 were older
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
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 of
people
Use synonyms
.
In
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
addition,
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 the other percentage of online
users
Use synonyms
 was middle age
people
Use synonyms
 over the given time period. The huge percentage of digital audience, which was 40% from all the parts,
mainly
Add a missing verb
was mainly
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 used by
people
Use synonyms
 who
was
Change the verb form
were
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in
Change preposition
apply
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ages 13-25 years old.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the next audience who use social media in
pie
Correct article usage
the pie
show examples
 chart was 26-35
aged
Correct word choice
apply
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adults and they consisted above a third
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 of all the figure.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
less
Correct your spelling
lowest
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 proportion of citizens who
also
Linking Words
 use
an online platforms
Correct the article-noun agreement
an online platform
online platforms
show examples
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 older
people
Use synonyms
 and oldest
users
Use synonyms
, which consisted
8
Change preposition
of 8
show examples
% and 2%.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a small minority of account holders, consisting
15
Change preposition
of 15
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% of
whole
Change the article
the whole
show examples
 chart,
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 in ages 36-46 years old.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words users, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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